Drama Queen
by Regina Evans
Summary: A cherik high school au where Charles is an actor and Erik is a techie. And Charles is totally straight. Completely... Avenger cameos included, giant cameo by Loki
1. Nine in the Afternoon

"That's it. I need a break!"

Charles was sick of the lights and their constant attack on his pupils. Maybe he was taking advantage of his lead role to ask for a break, but lord knows everyone needed it.

He didn't need to rip the mic off. He didn't need to throw his costume on the ground and he certainly didn't need to slam the changing room door behind him as if it was his personal trailer. This was a high school production. And here he was, fulfilling his title of drama queen. He didn't fucking care. He didn't care what they thought. Didn't care how he looked to them. Let them think what they want.

As soon as the door slammed, his breath hitched and speed up as tears poured down his face. Now if only it were so easy while he was on the stage. It just got to be too much sometimes. The pressure, the people, the lights, the chairs. All the chairs. The chairs that would be full in…two days. Only two days. How the hell was he supposed to be ready in two days. Well he did have all his lines memorized and…everything was choreographed…and…well okay so he was ready. But what did ready really even mean?

He started at a knock on his door and immediately scrubbed at the tears. The smudged make-up helped conceal them.

"When you're done, I'll help you put your mic back on."

The mysterious voice left and Charles just turned and stared at the closed door. "How did you know I took it off?"

He heard a scoff and a small laughter. "You don't know what a beautiful sound that thump made in my ear piece. I can't thank you enough. Don't throw the equipment around next time, it costs money. And so does make up. You're an actor. You shouldn't have to cry."

At that Charles yanked the door open to confront this son of a bitch who thought he knew him, but the door frame was empty.

Charles quietly shut the door and began reapplying his makeup. It was only when he put on the finishing touch, after having found that this was the best he'd ever done, that he realized his costume wasn't on. He cursed as he stared at the pile. There was a knock on the door, and Charles stomped with rage as he opened it was more energy than necessary.

A young man wearing a ridiculously out of period turtleneck found himself knocking on Charles's forehead. Charles stood and waited for the kid to speak, but…damn, Charles didn't even know his name…Turtleneck, that would have to do. Turtleneck just stood there speechless, looking down. Finally, he cleared his throat, "Um…did you, uh, want me to come back then?" His eyes glanced down quickly again and then hurriedly looked away down the hallway. Tech guys. The other actors would call this overdressed. He still had his briefs on for god's sake. Charles let out a sigh and pulled the fucking dumb ass tech into the small room. As he was bent over to pick the mic up off the floor, he decided to remember he was nearly naked and stood upright with a shy smile. Actor. He wasn't really into guys, but hell, he'd have fun with this while he could.

His eyes flickered down as his eyelids fluttered. He tucked a stray strand of hair behind his ear as he looked up. Upper teeth dragging across his bottom lip with his eyebrows smashed together in apology. "I…I'm sorry I nearly killed your mic. Can you ever forgive me?"

Turtleneck started laughing. Small at first, but it gradually grew until he was nearly doubled over laughing and struggling to stand. He coughed a bit and tried to subdue it, but a tear escaped his eye and he rubbed at it as he grabbed the equipment from Charles. With a sudden disinterest in Charles's exposed skin, he strapped the mic onto his back. This time Charles jumped while Turtleneck's fingers brushed his back and stomach. He turned to leave as Charles was…no it wasn't reluctant, just slow…Charles slowly pulled his pants back on. The boy seemed to vibrate with contained laughter. "Didn't think that'd actually work." Turtleneck closed the door behind him and Charles's eyebrows furrowed. An act, hm? Two can play that game.

-x-

Charles really didn't care much for the current play that was opening and no one else really did either. Charles was the lead and someone had to keep the others motivated, so Charles took it on himself to feign passion. He claimed to be going to a dressing room to re-evaluate and study the script for an potential misunderstandings (though it was quite simple so everyone knew that was bullshit), but truthfully, he wanted to write. It was foolish to believe he could both finish the script and have it bound on time to try to convince Ms. Carter he bought it.

His pen scrawled words effortlessly onto the page, of course the words were also incoherent, but maybe his subconscious would surprise him. The last thing he expected was his door swinging open. He made it quite clear that he did _not_ like to be disturbed and _everyone_ knew that for the sake of their own lives, but not the new guy. Turtleneck. Charles clutched the notebook to his chest as Turtleneck's eyes flicked from it to the script lying long abandoned under a chair. Neither said a word and the uncomfortable silence grew. Charles cleared his voice and looked pointedly at the door, which Turtleneck then closed. Charles pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. "No, that meant 'leave' not 'oh please I want more privacy with you.' I thought we passed that phase already." _You manipulative bitch. Yes, bitch. I don't care if you're male. You are a bitch. A bitch whose mouth just parted and whose tongue is visible as you speak…_ Charles blinked. "I'm sorry you said something?"

Turtleneck smirked. "I said I came by to discuss the rigging with you. You have a _small_ flying entrance and I wanted to be sure everything was cleared up before we fling you into the air." Charles was slightly mortified when he received the part of Peter Pan regardless of the norm being to cast a female actress. Apparently he had not only the right height and physique but, god save him, the voice.

Of course this idiot was understating the extent of flying the play required of him. "Yes wonderful, I wasn't aware. What do I need to know." The casual sarcasm seemed to be Turtleneck's way of…polite conversation. Turtleneck was ignoring their past encounters and was speaking to him professionally.

"…the rigging is going to be green, just in case." Charles blinked again and mentally kicked himself. What…what was distracting him? "I'm…sorry." He suddenly felt ashamed. Charles prided himself on his careful focus and professionalism, yet he couldn't stop thinking about Erik's hands strapping the mic onto his back and that just…didn't make much sense.

Turtleneck shrugged nonchalantly. "You were writing. I imagine you must be quite good if it's taking this long for the _author_ to come back to reality."

Charles's eyes instantly became moist. No one had every complimented his writing. No one _knew_ about his writing. Now it was Turtleneck's turn to blink. Oh did Charles know how his eyes looked when near to tears. It was a trick he used often. But he didn't expect to blink and find Turtleneck gone, door slamming on his way out.

-x-

Charles checked the watch on the chair and, yes, dinner break was over. He reemerged for rehearsals. They hadn't started rehearsing the flying and they'd surely be here until 11 earliest. Charles leapt across the stage with an energy he didn't have as it was mostly to distract from Wendy and Peter's height difference. Why Ms. Carter insisted on Charles and Emma always being leads together, he'll never understand. She's convinced they have a telepathic connection, but Charles thought that was bullshit. He was still waiting for Moira, the stage manager, to gather up enough courage to audition. He longed to trade lines with her. She was a raw and natural talent when she helped him rehearse.

Charles never ceased to be amazed by the video they projected as his shadow. It required a careful coordination on his part, but even from where he stood, it looked quite good, until something blinded him. He quickly shielded his eyes and lost step with the projected image. "Who the hell is in charge of Tinkerbell today? Do they not realize they shine the laser pointer everywhere _except_ the actors' eyes?" Again the green light flashed into his eyes and he'd be damned if he wasn't looking at the silhouette of a finely sculpted figure wearing a turtleneck in the sound booth. Charles's open mouth quickly shut and he murmured something that included turtleneck, and a repetition of the word 'fuck' and alternating phrases of 'fuck you' and thought he wasn't sure which meaning he intended, and laughed at his joke. After all, that was just a joke. Then remembered he was mic'd. "Fuck you. Piss off and let me rehearse will you? What the hell do you have against me?" Charles would never hear it, but alone in the sound booth, Erik was surprised to hear himself mutter "Nothing yet."

-x-

Erik bolted after rehearsals. He needed his computer. He needed to relax into the complex process of programming. It was almost time to add in graphics expect for the small problem…his video game didn't yet have a story line. He had character ideas and visuals to with them that his artist had drawn for him, but no adventure for them to go on. And that was why he couldn't progress. He stared at the blinking cursor and longed to finally fucking fill it with text. Maybe he should just ask his artist, after all, she was his ex and they were still getting along. Okay they were friends. He kept trying to convince her to start drawing realism, but she was just in love with drawing cartoons and it worked for Erik's game so he couldn't complain. He just knew she could do better. She could certainly do better than him. As a boyfriend. Well do better with selecting a boyfriend than she had when choosing him.

Video games were a combination of everything he loved. Computers, stories, architecture, anger management, and violence. Erik stared at the screen. He wasn't sure why Magneto was designed to look pretty much exactly like himself, but when artists insist, _they insist._ Something felt wrong about him being the protagonist. He needed a new character. No one he had was quite right.

Of course Erik's thoughts kept returning to one person, but he would put himself through hell before he went through with that. He'd been mentally picking on Charles since he laid eyes on him. Everything about him screamed 'I'm a spoiled rich attention whore' but when the sobbing was picked up by his headset, he recognized a façade when he saw one. And being able to relate was more alluring than he'd dare to admit to even himself. So he'd keep up the teasing and try not to think about it. That'd be the best route…but he was a writer…and Erik needed a storyline. Why he allowed himself to connect with people, he'll never understand and will probably always regret.


	2. I Won't Say I'm in Love

The next day at rehearsals, Erik sat himself in his shadowed box of tiny lights, switches and buttons. He ran the booth alone, so he wasn't sure why there were footsteps coming towar…

Charles's eyebrows were furrowed and his lips pursed, unfortunately for him he'd been made to change into his costume before rehearsals and was now standing in front of Erik in tights and basically a short dress. It was when Erik saw the hair that his laughter broke through. Charles started to grow a little angry, but then bit his lip and chuckled as well. "Yes, the dye is a bit unnerving in the mirror."

Erik nearly fell out of his chair. "That's not a wig? What kind of torture are they using on you! Do you see the shade of that! You may as well walk around with a cone on your head." Erik's laugh was small. Charles tried not to find it endearing, but failed.

"Oh come on, it's not that bad." Charles's comment was answered by silence and that was really much more of an answer than he ever wanted to hear. He sighed and vowed to not look in a mirror other than when he had to. "Anyway, I came to apologize." And with that he stepped forward and held out his hand. "A proper meeting? Our interactions haven't exactly been smooth and I would like to start fresh…if that's alright with you?" Erik laughter quickly faded. Apologize? Erik should be the one apologizing. He wasn't quite sure he understood, so he just shook the hand in front of him. Their hands lingered a moment too long when Charles took a deep breath and pulled away. "Good then! Clean slate. Charles Xavier. I don't think I caught your name."

Erik was shaking his head slowly. "You don't want to do this. I accepted your apology only because I should be apologizing to you, but I can't let it go beyond that."

Again, Charles's eyebrows furrowed and his lips pursed, this time in confusion. "I…At least your name?" Erik remained silent, a conflicted expression on his face that Charles couldn't understand. "You don't look entirely certain of yourself, so let me help. I _want_ to be your friend, so you should let me."

Erik stared at Charles for a long moment, flashes of what their friendship could be and what it could become flashed through his mind. What he also thought of was how it would end, how his last relationship ended and how he wished it had never started. No. He'd save Charles. The beautiful young man didn't need to know what he was missing.

Erik returned to his booth. "Mic check in 5."

Charles stood for a while and watched in silence as Erik checked the mics of the rest of the cast. He only moved when Emma had finished and Charles was next up. He'd say his heart was breaking, but that he didn't know Erik well enough for that…did he?

After rehearsals Charles pulled Moira into his dressing room.

"Charles what the hell, I have to take the rigging down or Carter will bitch at me for the rest of the week… woah what's wrong?"

Charles opened his mouth to retort that nothing was wrong, but "Wait, what do you mean what's wrong? What am I doing that you think something is wrong?"

Moira glanced down for a moment, confused that Charles didn't noticed, and gently pried his fingernails out of his arm he'd been holding in a tight grip. "Peter Pan didn't have fingernail shaped scars on his arm. Did that not hurt?"

Charles flexed his hand as the pain set in. "…ow."

Moira took an extremely deep breath and sighed. "Okay I know you're psycho, but seriously, what's up?"

Charles licked his lips. "Nothing, I was just curious abou-"

"Bullshit." Moira folded her arms. "You can deny it, but don't lie to me. Something is wrong. Now what are you curious about."

Charles pressed his lips together. "The tech guy."

Moira nodded. "The guy whose pants you've been trying to get into."

Charles jaw dropped. "Moira…_Moira. Moira, what the hell?_ I'm not. Moira, I'm not gay."

The words 'No, you're bi' floated through her head, but she doubted Charles wanted to hear that. She was out of line anyway, if he wanted to stay in the closet, it wasn't up to her to force him out. "Sorry, no of course not. Just teasing. What about him?"

Charles stared at her for a moment before he was sure she was really kidding. He underestimated her acting. She was probably better than him. "I was just wondering who the hell he was and why he feels the need to screw with me during rehearsals."

The Tinkerbell incident floated through their minds. She tsked. "Oh come on, that was an accident." Charles's eyes narrowed but she kept talking. "All I can tell you is his name is-"

Charles's hands waved through the air. "NO. No nononono no. You can't tell me his name. Just skip that part."

Again she stared at him, but Charles had always been odd and she'd learned to just give in after a while. "He's just here for the fine arts credit. He's a programmer. Now, I have to go and organize the set pieces. If you get too excited thinking about all that, use the couch. God knows it's seen enough of that already."

Charles's eyes were wide as she spoke while she walked through the open door way. "_Moira._" He hissed her name as she walked away. He couldn't help but watch her figure as she walked. She was right. The couch had seen enough of that. Sometimes he wondered if the couch missed Moira as much as he did. They were a good pair. He's still not sure why he broke it off, but it never truly felt like they broke up. It was just like they were waiting to get back together again. Maybe if she auditioned for the next play. That could be his sign to take action. But right now something about it felt…wrong.

-x-

Raven walked to the familiar place she always waited after school to be picked up. Two blocks away. She wasn't supposed to be seen with Charles. There was a reason for it, but she'd slowly forgotten it over the years and now it was just practiced habit. Whenever she brought it up, she saw a bit of fear in Charles's eyes and figured she'd just leave it if it were so important to bother him so easily. He could tell her when he was ready. Charles had been sure his sister was enrolled under a different name at school so no one would know they were related. Charles pulled up in his mini cooper. She stared at the car for a second and sighed. You can take the boy out of England, but you can't take the England out of the boy. They should've just left him at boarding school. He loved it there. Raven mostly enjoyed that he'd picked up an accent, but he hid it while he acted. No one at their school really knew he had an accent. Every now and then he slipped up, but his American accent stayed pretty strongly in place. Moira knew of course. Like it was possible for Charles to be in the same room as someone he was attracted to and not use all forms of seduction at the same time. When the American accent dropped, Charles was giving you his A-game. So far, only Moira had gotten that treatment.

-x-

Charles smiled softly as Raven got in the car. Maybe he was supposed to be used to it, but it still hurt to just walk passed her in the hallway. They drove in silence for a while until Charles couldn't take Raven's emotionless face anymore. "Golly good show. I think I'll get some crisps. There's a bloody long queue. Tea and crumpets instead?" His mouth pulled up at the corner as he glanced at her.

She lasted longer than usual. After a few moments with her hand over her mouth, Raven busted out laughing. "I WILL NEVER GET OVER THAT. Seriously, you can't just do that without warning me. The words are too much. The accent alone gets me every time, but _queue_ really? You had to say…" Her words trailed off as she stared at her brother. "I love you."

She knew what Charles always thought when she said that, but she said it anyway because she had to. Because it was true. His first response had been 'you shouldn't' but now he just looked at her sadly. She knew he loved her back, but he couldn't bring himself to say it. There were some things that Raven just grew up with and didn't question. What she didn't know what how many of these instances happened without her knowing.

After that, Charles was strangely quiet. Raven knew something was wrong, but she could also tell Charles had entangled himself in his own thoughts and interrupting him would be counterproductive. She sat in silence and stealthily lowered the radio for him. When they arrived home, he parked the car, grabbed his stupid messenger bag that he insisted on wearing, and walked directly to his room. If anything described how wrong something was it was that. Charles had never walked inside without talking to his dad first. They could talk for hours about whatever extremely easy science lab Charles had that day, about what traits Charles had gotten from his father and which from his mother, but never did they bring up Raven in this conversation. Again, it was Charles being protective and their dad had nothing to do with the taboo.

Raven listened to Charles's door close as she walked in. She glanced at her father waiting at the table, panic showing easily on his face, just as readable as Charles was. She had a project to work on, but family was a priority.

-x-

Charles dropped straight onto his bed. Ha. Straight. What the fuck did Moira mean. He wasn't trying to get. Well, he was allowed to think of. Women called each other pretty. Wasn't it okay for men to do the same thing? Turtleneck was attractive. That doesn't make Charles gay. It…doesn't…

He pinched the bridge of his nose. He'd tried to erase all memories of the boxers incident from his mind but it kept coming back to him and luckily enough his subconscious had prepared him a matching de-turtlenecked Turtleneck to go with it. He couldn't. Charles didn't like guys like that. He and Moira had gone at it more times than he could count. And that had been great. Charles had liked that. Too much probably. Moira was a girl. He liked that she was a girl. It was good. So why…why did he keep dreaming of Turtleneck laying on their couch? Charles couldn't be gay. He couldn't.


	3. Stop and Stare

The next day at rehearsals, Charles couldn't get in character and everyone could see it. He hated it. That was putting it lightly. He hated being see-through. He hated not hiding behind his role as he was on stage. It was his safety net and he needed it. Yet here he was on stage, no energy, stumbling through his lines, accent slipping awkwardly but not enough to be noticeable. Ms. Carter called break and Charles bolted for his changing room. After a few moments Charles heard footsteps, then a bit of whispering. A high voice and a low one, neither truly distinguishable until the voices raised. "I just want to know what's wrong." Turtleneck's voice pierced the silence like a fired gun. Charles could hear Moira huff at him. "Please, he's a good friend of mine and new friends are the last thing he needs around right now. I know you're trying to help but you have to trust me on this one." Moira certainly knew how to disguise her meaning, because Charles read it loud and clear. 'You're causing the fucking problem, fuck off.'

Moira slipped inside and sat by Charles's legs while he lied on his side on the couch. It was silent for a bit until Charles spoke. "How did we manage to find a fucking dressing room this big, put a couch in it, and fuck to our hearts content so often?"

Moira spit up a bit of laughter. "Because we're risky teenage idiots who had nothing better to do?" She smiled down at Charles, but he looked up at her with such confusion and desperation that she lied down in the small space next to him, nearly falling off. He scooted closer to the back and wrapped his arms around her in a familiar embrace. They simply lied close for a while. Moira cleared her throat after moments that felt like an eternity. "I'm sorry I said that yesterday. I was sure you'd realized sooner… I mean I thought it was all intentional. I didn't mean to-"

A tear fell down Charles's cheek at the same time he pressed his lips to Moira's. Maybe it was force of habit, but tongues quickly met in a mad desire that had so long been missing. Charles pulled away for a moment. "I don't want it to be intentional. What _we_ had was intentional. I don't want to. Moira, I'm not. I can't." Tears continued to pour down his cheeks. "_Fuck_. I haven't cried this much since John 'accidently' burned the Cats costume I made."

Moira kissed the tear on his cheek. "Oh god. That was horrible. You worked so hard on that."

Charles stayed quiet for a bit more, then continued in a horse whisper, tears flowing even harder. "I lied, you know. He…he didn't burn it. When he saw me making it, he called me…queer. I burned it myself."

Moira's arms quickly snaked around Charles's torso and squeezed him as tight as possible. "Charles, it's okay. You're allowed to be bi. It's really not as bad as you're making it out to be."

Charles pulled away enough to make eye contact with her. "Not so bad? I'm not even out in the open and I'm bullied about it. Maybe people think I'm this strong and sure actor, but I'm _always_ an actor. I put on an act in this school and people bully the toned down image of me. Imagine if I was just myself!"

At that, Moira looked close to tears as well. "I've never had to imagine that."

Charles just stared into her eyes and kissed her again. Their foreheads pressed together and he sighed. "I shouldn't be doing this with you. We broke up."

Moira kneed him lightly. "Oh please. We're both much too touchy to ever completely break up. I wouldn't be surprised if we both got married and made out as greeting to each other."

Charles buried his face in the crook of her neck. "Oh god, that image doesn't sound too fantastical."

Moira shook with laughter. "What the fuck is your vocabulary?" She paused for a moment. "I'm glad I get to hear your accent again. I missed it."

He simply smiled at her. Her hands tugged at his 'dress.' His eyes widened a bit as she tugged it off him and he slowly moved to unbutton her shirt. Both shirts were, well relatively gently placed on the floor. Their bodies pressed together. It was comfortable. It was familiar. And it was contact that Charles needed more than he knew. They did nothing more than lay still, Charles's tears sliding down Moira's bare skin.

The door burst open. "I've been knocking for fucking hours, are you ready ye-"

Erik found himself staring at the couple on the couch. Moira grabbed her shirt with a string of profanities as she rebuttoned it. "Jesus Christ, Lehnsherr! It's a fucking dressing room! You never fucking open a dressing room. It's opened from the inside only! We have goddammed rules around here! Get the fuck out! What the hell do you think you're doing?"

The whole time Moira yelled, Charles and Erik locked eyes. Charles shirtless, eyes red and watery. Erik staring at the man, crumpled to pieces in front of him, and couldn't stop the compassion. The want. But another glance at Moira's wrongly paired buttons and he left without another word.

-x-

He slammed the door behind him and Moira turned to Charles. Charles's eyes were still staring at where Erik had been standing. He seemed dazed. "…Charles? Are you alright?"

Charles's eyes didn't move. "He…he's going to think we're dating now."

More silence. But Moira was fairly sure she understood what he was thinking. "Do you want him to think that? We could…if you wanted of course. We could get back together."

Charles was still as stone where he lied. His tongue ran across his lip and tugged it into his mouth to chew on. "I…I'm. No I don't think…we should do that. Could you actually…or should I… tell him we're not?"

Moira's eyes softened. She knew Charles was brave but she'd never been as proud of him as she was now. She walked over and ran her hand through his hair. "I'm so proud of you."

His lips picked up in a small smile as he batted her hand away. "Raven usually says that." He stared at Moira, happy that she knew. That she understood what was going on with him and his sister. He took a deep breath. Yes, things were making more sense.

He tugged at the buttons on her shirt and she began to protest until she realized she'd buttoned them wrong. She blushed and redid them. "That would've been a bit sketchy to announce we're not dating."

Charles laughed softly. "Our whole relationship is sketchy." He sat up and rubbed at his face.

"You're okay? You need help cleaning up?"

He shook his head. "No, I got it. Tell Carter I'll be out in five."

She smiled again and left. A few silent moments and then a soft knock. Charles was tugging his shirt on as he said come in. Turtleneck pushed the door open, eyes focused on the floor, but still managing to see Charles's exposed skin. "Actually, I have to ask you to take that off again. Carter wants the rigging on."

Charles bit his lip. "Can you close the door?" He moved without a word and Charles stretched as he tugged his shirt off again. "Did she talk to you?"

Turtleneck glanced up to Charles's eyes before returning to stare at the one magnificent area of floor. "Who?"

Charles stood, his eyes still red, "Moira. Did she tell you we're…not dating?"

Erik could read the complex emotions flickering through Charles's eyes, but he could also tell his words were the truth. "That's a little hard to believe right now." He held out the rigging for Charles to step into.

Charles sighed. "Would you believe if I said we're semi recently broken up and not completely over each other?" Charles turned his back to Turtleneck and tried to step into the strange contraption. He fell forward a bit, but Turtleneck's hand was quickly on his stomach, holding him up. As soon as Charles regained his balance the hand was gone. "Can I please know your name now?" Charles's arms were forced into place and straps secured and tightened. Turtleneck turned to leave, but Charles lunged for the door to close it. "Please."

Turtleneck stared down at the bright blue eyes, still shining with fresh tears. "Erik."

Charles slid out of the way and let him leave. His eyebrows furrowed, but he felt a small smile tug at his lips. As usual, Moira was right.

-x-

Charles cleared his thoughts as he washed his face and reapplied make up. It'd be no use thinking through things now so he'd finish rehearsals and then find _Erik_ and try to speak with him some more.

The flying turned out to be a lot easier than Charles was anticipating and they got out earlier than he was expecting. He noticed Raven step in the theater, but she was there to help with the set. She'd call Charles was she was ready to leave and he'd come back to pick her up, but for now Charles was on his own to find Erik.

When Erik's head popped up from behind the sound booth, he spotted Charles immediately. "Please tell me you're not planning to keep your hair like that after the show."

Charles smirked and ruffled his hand through it. "Even if I wanted to, Emma told me she's preparing a bath of dye on closing night that she's going to use to either dye my hair or drown me in."

Erik smirked. "I like Emma." Charles's eyes flickered and Erik turned to look back at Charles while he continued wrapping up wires. "Not like…"

Charles bit his lip and nodded. "Do you want to…maybe…are you hungry?"

Erik laughed without turning around and locked the mic box, slipping the keys in his pocket in a way that he somehow made look sexual. "Not really."

Charles's shuffled and turned to leave. "Oh. Right then. I…so-"

Erik rolled his eyes and fell into step beside Charles. "Not really, but I'll go anyway." Charles's eyes grew wide and he bit his lip again, struggling with the decision to walk closer or farther from Erik and ending up not changing the distance. He opened his mouth to talk, but Erik interrupted. "You're British?"

Charles covered his mouth with his hands and stopped walking. "Hell. I wasn't?" Erik's eyes looked more amused than curious. Charles smiled shyly and sighed as he unlocked his mini cooper. "Don't tell anyone?"

Erik grinned from where he stood by the passenger door of the car. "You're telling them yourself by driving this." Charles opened the door and got in. His whole body grew heated as Erik joined him and closed the door behind him. Charles put the key in the ignition slowly. "Charles, if you don't feel comfortable…it's not like we even know each other too well."

Charles cleared his throat. "Yet. This is just…new."

Erik visually relaxed in a way that made Charles wonder how he hadn't previously seen the man's tension. "God. Okay yeah that explains a lot." He slumped down in the passenger seat and glanced at Charles out of the corner of his eye. "I don't know how comfortable you are talking about it, but there really is a surprising amount of bi people in this school alone." Charles recoiled at the word and Erik, usually so reserved and sullen, found himself reaching for Charles's hand. "We don't have to go anywhere public."

Charles gave a short nod. "I read you as a much more isolated person. You seem really open right now."

Erik's eyes were wide and his face shocked. "Yes. I'm equally as surprised by it as you are. I'm generally not…like this." He slowly took his hand off of Charles's. "If you're not comfortable driving, I can drive and take you back to your car when we're done."

Charles slumped in defeat, thinking about how he had to pick up Raven in a few hours anyway. "That's probably the best idea." They retreated from the car, and Erik didn't say a word about the hairbrush covered with blonde hair that had been in the open glove compartment.

-x-

"I wouldn't have picked you out as a jeep kind of guy."

Erik shrugged as they continued down the road, alternate rock station playing quietly in the background. "So are you actually hungry? Or was that just an excuse of a question?"

Charles smirked. "No, not necessarily hungry."

Erik glanced over at Charles. "Good because I had no fucking idea where to go if you didn't want to go out in public but still have food."

Charles chuckled. "Drive-throughs exist, don't they?" Erik shrugged and pulled in to a small neighborhood park. Charles's eyes widened and he made his way toward a gazebo. It was a small area with enough room for a small table and two stools. It was a table Charles felt at home with no matter who he was around. "I've been here before! My dad took me here when I was little. This is where I learned to play chess." He sat at the table and stared down. "Wow I don't remember ever being able to see the board this well. Height certainly helps."

Erik remained outside the gazebo, watching. He scoffed. "Like you know anything about height."

Charles's jaw dropped and Erik fully smiled. "Kidding, Charles."

Charles leaned his elbow on the table, with a look that said 'you're not, but I'll let it slide.' "Do you play?"

Erik turned back to the car and retrieved a small box. He opened it and Charles grabbed at the white pieces to set up his side of the board. He murmured something Charles assumed was "No surprise there." And the next few hours were spent in companionable silence.

-x-

Charles was about to knock his king over to Erik's checkmate, when he flew up from his seat. "Fuck! It's…what time is it? Oh god, we need to. Get back to the school. Oh my god."

Charles rushed to return Erik's pieces to their case and Erik helped without questions until they got into the car. "Oh god it's almost 11. I'm so dead." He leaned forward, face in his hands.

Erik kept glancing over. "What, do you have a curfew?"

Charles laughed. "You could say that." They were about to pass where Raven waited and Charles prayed she wasn't visible. He saw her as they passed and luckily she was in a shadow. Erik parked next to the mini cooper that looked abandoned in the parking lot. Charles placed his hand on the handle to get out.

"Charles…" Erik wasn't too sure what he was doing. He blinked when those ridiculous eyes fell on his. Force of habit had him pull out one of his business cards. "Usually you'd get a handwritten number but I don't have a pen on me. If you need to talk, I'll listen. If you insist on me being your friend, I may as well be helpful."

Charles's eyes grew moist again and Erik wanted to pull him forward. It took all he had to not reach out. Charles was still trying to accept it all and Erik being rash wouldn't help him. Before he did it, he mentally rolled his eyes at himself, but couldn't stop the need to reach out for Charles's hand. His cheeks grew hot as he brought his lips to the back of Charles's hand, caution emphasizing his every move, ready to stop whenever Charles asked. Charles pulled his hand away slowly, but there was a smile on his face. "Tomorrow?"

Erik nodded as Charles opened the door. "Good night, Charles."

Charles beamed. The day couldn't have been spent any better. "Good night…Erik." He shut the door and watched Erik drive away. He stood there for a while, just staring. "Oh…shit. Shit shit shit Raven." He jumped in the car and pulled up in front of her.

She jumped in and slammed the door harder than necessary. "Jesus, Charles! I thought you were going to leave me here all night! It's been over 30 minutes! What the hell were you… Oh my god you met someone."

Charles's face fell against the steering wheel. "Do you and Moira talk behind my back or am I really that readable?"

Raven smirked. "Both, but don't worry about it. Come on, throw your love story at me. Who is it now? Is it Emma? Oh my god please not Emma. I really thought you'd never go for her, but I'm not so sure anymore. I don't know what Ms. Carter sees, you don't have any chemistry together. When are you breaking up with her?"

Charles laughed as he put the car in gear and began to drive home. "No, Raven. It's not Emma. I can't tell you who it is. I'm sure you'll find out soon enough anyway."

Raven stared. "So she's in theater. Are you back with Moira? I love Moira, but you two are totally just platonic…maybe friends with benefits."

Charles reached over and turned the radio on. "Raven. You need to stop, this is getting creepy."

She pursed her lips. "So it is Moira? Huh. I really thought you'd find someone new by now." She dug through her bag and pulled out her sketch book. She had someone in mind for Charles, but there were all the rules and besides, she knew how Charles was.

"It's not Moira." The drove the rest of the way listening to Charles's weird taste in music and Raven stared at, but dared not bring pencil to paper in a moving car, her sketches. He always complained that she shouldn't, but screw it. She wanted to draw Charles.


	4. I'm With You

Erik nearly died through his classes the next day. He slept through everything but English. They were watching a movie in English for some idiotic reason, but reasons didn't matter. The door opened, but Erik was too intent on the movie to turn around.

"Oh. Um is Mr. Stark here?"

Erik whipped around and caught Charles's eye. They both froze for a moment until Charles dragged his eyes away. "Mentally or physically?" The man's harsh voice cut through the silence and Charles handed the paper to Tony, no one called him Mr. Stark. "Parker." Peter got up to receive his early release and left. Charles turned to leave, but caught Erik's eye again. Erik couldn't stop staring. The light of the movie flickered in Charles's eyes. It was hypnotizing. "Xavier?"

Charles looked to Tony as his face turned red. "Sorry sir, I'll leave."

Tony shook his head. "No, I was going to ask you to come see me after school today."

Charles opened his mouth in surprise. "Sir…I. Yes. Yes, sir. I'll see you later." He bolted from the room.

Erik turned to stare at Tony and found Tony staring right back, looking smug. After a few minutes of the staring game which no one had yet won, the bell rang and the other sleeping students quickly evacuated the room. Erik went up to Tony's desk. "Tony, why the hell did you do that to him?"

He shrugged. "Need to talk to him. Asked him to come by. Didn't do anything."

Erik's eyes narrowed. "Don't embarrass him next time."

Tony sighed. "Erik, as much as I like you, I need to remind you that you are a student and I'm technically supposed to write you up for saying stuff like that to me, but I won't because I can tell you're just protecting your boy."

Erik slung his backpack on. "Don't you dare mention that to anyone. Not a _soul_. Not Ms. Potts. Not Mr. Rogers. No one."

Tony bit off the pen top to doodle on his paper. "Why not? Thought you were out?"

Erik nodded. "But he's not."

They locked eyes and reached an understanding without words. Tony gestured to the door. "You're gonna be late. Take a pass."

Erik glanced down and took the slip of paper from Tony. He looked him in the eye. "Thank you."

-x-

After his last class ended, Erik gave it a few minutes and then went to sit out front of Tony's door. He couldn't hear anything, but he hoped Tony wasn't doing anything stupid.

Charles had entered Tony's room slowly. He'd never been in any sort of detention and he wasn't sure what exactly he'd done to earn it. Tony glanced up from his computer. "Shut the door." Charles did so and then sat at the desk closest to the front of the room. So he was a teacher's pet and it usually showed, so what. "You're not in trouble."

Charles's shoulders fell from where he hadn't realized they were tense. "I'm…not?"

Tony shook his head. "No. I want to talk to you about Lehnsherr."

Charles went rigid. What the hell was a teacher doing, a teacher he didn't even have for class, asking him about Erik? "Excuse me? What do you mean?"

Tony glanced at Charles over his computer screen again, but this time sighed and got up to pull a chair in front of Charles's desk. "I'm not blind, kid. Been there done that. But I'm not here to lecture you about what you don't want to talk about. I just want you to be careful around him. I've known him for a while. He's quick to anger. Last girl he was with seemed just as firey as he is, and that still didn't work out. Even if just as a friend, he cares about you. And that's dangerous. If you make an enemy of any sort, you better be sure he doesn't know about it. If anything happens come talk to me. Or tell Ste- Mr. Rogers I sent you to him. Yeah, you'd probably relate more to him. From an old friend to a new one." Charles wasn't sure how to react so he just sat in silence and took it all in. "Now go on. He's probably waiting for you outside."

Tony returned to his computer and gave Charles nothing to do but leave.

-x-

Erik stood when the door opened, but didn't move forward. Who knew what the fuck Tony said to him. Tony knew everything. Charles glanced toward Erik and walked on without a word. Erik's heart fell.

"Are you coming?" Charles was a few feet away, waiting.

Erik could've punched himself in the face. "Yeah. Of course." Charles blushed and twitched ever so slightly away from Erik, kept his hands in his pockets, and did his best not to be obvious as he scanned the hallway for on looking classmates. Erik wished he could do something to make Charles more comfortable in public, but he of all people knew it took time. He also had Steve and Tony practically…no they actually did parade down the hall for a self-proclaimed gay pride week. Erik was actually rather surprised how many people ignored it. Because ignorance meant indifference and indifference was a form of acceptance because, at least it was violent protesting. "Tony's cool, ya know. I mean he's a bit much at first, but you get used to it. If he's trying to force anything on you…"

Charles shook his head. "No. No, it was nothing like that." He mumbled, "Quite the opposite actually."

Erik nodded, not hearing the second part. "Good." He was _so_ tempted to ask, but getting involved in Tony's schemes was never high on his priority list.

Erik was absolutely certain at this point that things were going to go slowly. He could be patient. Of course he could. Even when Charles had his shirt off to put the rigging on. It was no problem. Really. Charles could take his time and "Would you join me in the dressing room?"

Erik stopped walking. "Wait, _what_?"

Charles blinked and Erik realized no one was around anymore, they'd reached the stage and were the first ones there. Erik stared down at Charles. "So you're forward in private."

Charles shrugged and slipped inside without waiting for Erik.

-x-

Erik stared at the door. The same one he'd opened only…what two days ago? They'd barely talked. How was it that he was being invited in here now? He tried not to think about it and reached for the door handle, but it was locked.

He heard Charles chuckle from inside. "We have rules here. It only opens from the inside."

Erik didn't understand. "Then open it? What do you expect me to do from here?"

It was quiet for a moment and then Erik saw the door move as Charles leaned on it. "Convince me."

Then he realized what was going on. "Jesus, Charles. I should've realized you'd be a tease. Just open the door so I can come in."

Again the door moved as Charles walked away. "Oh you want to come in? Come in and do what?"

Erik nearly kicked the door in. "So I can kiss the straight out of you."

He knew his words were blunt, but it made Charles shut up _and_ the door opened so he considered it a victory. The door opened to a rather frazzled looking Charles. "_Kiss_ it out of me?"

Erik shrugged. "Worth a shot." Erik closed the dressing room door behind him. Charles's eyes stayed trained on the door. "Charles, you don't have to. I was kidding."

A bit more silence and staring at the door then, "I want you to." Erik stared and Charles's eyes finally met his. "I want you to kiss me." He didn't have to ask twice. Erik walked slowly toward Charles, again caution in his every move. One hand brushed through Charles's hair and the other wrapped slowly around to hold his back. Charles actually laughed more a moment as he put his arms around Erik's neck. "Why am I the girl?"

Erik's expression didn't react and remained intent on his goal to kiss Charles without leaving him comatose in shock. "You could also ask why you were cast as Peter Pan."

Charles brought their toes together with a kick. "That's hardly fair."

Erik's mouth twitched up into a smirk. "British again. Do I get to know why you hide it?"

Charles remained staring into Erik's eyes. It seemed like this stage would be odd for his first…well gay kiss, but it felt so easy with Erik. So…right. "I'll tell you more about my mouth after your tongue's been in it."

Erik lost all composure and his head fell onto Charles's shoulder as he shook with laughter. Both his arms wrapped around him. "God, you're a slut." He kissed Charles's neck, no longer able to see his reaction and hoped everything was alright.

Charles brought his arms tentatively around Erik's ridiculously lean torso. "And you're anemic. Once again, things to talk about after I've had your tongue in my mouth."

Erik stood up straight and then leaned down until their noses were touching. "You're okay?"

Charles responded by tilting his head and Erik responded with the soft and gentle movement of simply tilting his chin up to have their lips meet. Intending to keep it tender, Erik moved to pull away, already smiling like a fool. Charles's hands were immediately on either side of Erik's face, deepening the kiss. Erik brought his hands to the small of Charles's back and felt Charles suck air out of his mouth as he gasped. Erik pulled away for just a moment, "Soft spot?" He rubbed circles with his forefinger in the spot on Charles's back.

Charles moved to continue the kiss, writhing and twitching as he did so, laughing into the touch. "Mmm calm down, we still have our clothes on."

At that Erik pulled away. "Even I'm not sure you're ready for that."

Charles shook his head as he flushed. "No. No I was just kidding. Sorry."

There was a knock on the door and Charles jumped out of his skin. Moira's voice cut through their silence. "Erik, when you're done, Carter needs you to help with the rigging."

Charles's jaw dropped. "Moira! Moira, what the hell? How…"

Moira's light laughter floated through the door. "If he's not in his sound booth, there's not many other places he could be."

Charles sighed and let his head rest comfortably against Erik's chest. "Later then?" Erik's eyes grew wide. "No! The talking, not the…se…just. Later. Here, after rehearsals yes?"

Erik laughed as he walked to the door. "After rehearsals and during break. I'll be back to help you with the rigging. Be sure you're ready to undress for me."

Charles laughed. "I'm always ready to undress for you."

-x-

Moira had taken over the sound booth because Ms. Carter asked Erik to run rigging back stage and that was ever so unfortunate for Charles, knowing whenever he was in the air, it was Erik holding him up. It rather nice flying off stage and falling into Erik's arms as he undid the rigging for Charles to walk back on. The hard part was to fall into Erik's arms and have it appear platonic. Charles was surprised to find himself wanting Erik's touch, even when there were eyes watching them, but he still played it off…as best he could. Erik's bony fingers wrapped around his torso and helped him to the ground. It was all Charles could do to not turn and kiss him right there. Erik helped. Knowing Charles wasn't ready to be seen with him like that yet, and pushed him on stage occasionally when Charles couldn't keep his eyes off Erik and missed his cue. Somehow, by some strange and lucky chance, no one had even noticed. Except Emma, but Emma noticed everything. She always knew what was going on as if she read it right out of your head.

At break, Charles waiting for the rest of the cast to leave for dinner until Erik could slip in unseen. Charles smiled up from his notebook as Erik walked in. "Know what I realized today?"

Erik sat next to him on the couch and slung an arm around his shoulder. "You really should warn me before you drop your accent. It's unnervingly sexy."

Charles stared fondly at Erik for a bit as Erik was distracted looking down at Charles's notebook. He hugged his notebook and blushed. "Not til it's done. But anyway, what I noticed. I, of course, am Peter Pan. But now Moira is at the sound booth so she's my sassy best friend, Tinkerbell. And you." Charles paused to kiss Erik on the cheek. "You are my pixie dust."

Erik's laugh was inaudible, but his chest rumbled like a purr. "We've hardly been together long enough for such confessions." Regardless of his harsh sounding words, he tilted Charles's face toward him to stare in his eyes. He just couldn't understand how there was such a connection between two people who knew nothing about each other. "I want to know you, Charles. You spend so much hiding, but I find it so hard to believe any of it is bad. Like your accent. For some ungodly reason you've decided not to grace the rest of the world with it. I guess that's good though, less people fawning over you. Like they don't have enough to like you for already." The light in Charles's eyes dimmed a little and Erik's eyebrows came together. "Sh, sorry. I'm talking too much. I guess…if you don't want to say you don't…I'll go first. Don't feel forced to follow up. Tell me what you want when you want. Me…um." Erik lied back against the couch, his head falling back and he looked up at the ceiling. "I was born in Germany but raised here."

Charles interrupted softly. "You're not hiding an accent too, are you?"

Erik's smile was understanding, but sad. "No, I didn't grow up with my parents. An American tourist found me in the street and brought me to America with them. I was put into foster care and I didn't stay with families for more than a school year until sophomore year when…well Tony and Steven took me in actually." Charles stared at Erik, eyes shimmering and mouth open. He dropped his notebook on the floor and curled into Erik, throwing his arms around him. Erik smiled down at him and ran a hand through his hair. "It's fine. I don't remember anything of Germany or my parents."

"But you want to find them." Charles looked up from where he'd cuddled and rested his head on the couch next to Erik's shoulder. Erik answered Charles's question with silence. Charles nodded. "I would too."

Erik shrugged. "They abandoned me to the streets. There's not much hope that I'll be happy with what I found."

Charles kissed Erik's jaw just because he was so close and it was so tempting. "You're allowed to sate your curiosity. If you're happy now, it would be nice to see the life you were saved from. If they're wonderful people who just lost you, then you gain another wonderful thing in your life."

Erik had been staring straight ahead, but looked to Charles then. "You mean like you?"

Charles blushed and looked away. "I'd hardly describe myself as that." He mumbled, "Not with the way I treat my sister." But it was just a jumble of sounds to Erik.

"I'll make that analysis for myself." Erik leaned to bring their lips together.

A short knock and then, "If you guys can manage to get untangled from each other, Carter needs rigging set up again." Erik sighed.

Charles got up and stretched. "Fuck, Moira! Your timing is impeccable." Charles opened the door with a smile.

Moira was smiling back. "It's good to see that happiness in your eyes again." She tucked some hair behind his ear and heard Erik make a sort of growling sound. They both glanced over in time to see him turn red and cough. "If you'll excuse me a moment, Erik." She tugged Charles into the hall to whisper, "You should tell her, Charles. And soon."

Charles's eyebrows furrowed. "You know I can't. There's rul-"

Moira rolled her eyes. "_Why_ are there rules?" She put her hand on Charles's shoulder. "Maybe you need to reevaluate, hm? Talk to her. About _everything_."

Charles's eyes grew wide. "Wait, _everything?_ Moira, I could barely tell her about you how am I supposed to… I mean you're a girl and…"

Moira stared into Charles's eyes with a sort of 'are you fucking kidding me' glare. "Tell her."

Charles stepped back in to see Erik staring at the closed notebook, but resisting the urge to open it. He looked up with a bit of protective anger and concern in his eyes. "What'd she say?"

The thoughts were still stirring in Charles's head and he looked a bit like a dear in the headlights when he glanced at the mirror. "Later?" He sat down at the stool to fix the lip prints Erik left in his foundation.

Erik stood behind Charles in the mirror. Sometimes it just got to be too much. "It's absurd how attractive you still are as a ginger."

Charles relaxed a bit and allowed the fear to leave him. "Oh hush. Now go make sure I'll be safe."

Erik bent down to kiss Charles's temple, then turned to whisper, "Always."

-x-

Charles spent quite a bit of the rehearsals with the image of a young Erik, stranded and alone, starved and lonely, on the streets of Germany.

When Carter finally dismissed them, Erik had the torturous job of undressing Charles to remove the rigging. Such a task involved 'unintentional' tickling and fits of laughter. Erik started to walk out the door but changed his mind and turned back. "Would you…" He paused and stared in silence for a moment. Then seemed to make up his mind. "Do you want to come over tonight?" Charles's mouth fell open a little, thinking. Erik nodded. "I'll go fix up the stage. Think about it and tell me when I get back."

Charles stared at the door. Go over Erik's? With Steve and Tony? Go over _Erik's? Go to Erik's house?_ He thought of the first time he went to Moira's house. The polite dinner with parents. Reading through the script. Mild, tame. Somehow he felt the first time at Erik's house would be a bit different. Erik came back in and Charles realized how long he hadn't moved for.

Erik cursed. "Have you been standing there this whole time? Fuck. I didn't mean to scare you. It's fine. You don't even have to think about it. We won't go tonight. It's fine, really."

Slowly Charles began to shake his head. "N-no. I want to go." He looked to Erik's eyes to see a fond look mixed with a touch of 'proud of you.' Charles flushed and took off his tights to finish changing. Nothing Erik hadn't already seen. Charles chuckled at the memory and glanced back toward Erik as he tripped into his jeans. "Do you know what I used to call you before you told me your name?"

Erik glanced up from Charles's torso to meet his eyes. "Sorry?" Charles smirked and repeated himself. "Can't say I do." Erik leaned against the wall and folded his arms, content with watching.

Charles dove into his shirt. "Turtleneck. Because you wore one every day and I used to find it repulsive but now I find it endearing." Charles wriggled to slip into the shirt and cleared his vision to see Erik's expression dark. "Wh…what happened? What's wrong? Erik. Erik what's wrong?"

He didn't move and his voice fell into a monotone. "Nothing. The nickname makes sense. Funny. Cute. You're cute."

Words to hide behind. Charles moved closer. "Erik…" His hand fell onto Erik's chest.

Erik brought his hand to rest on top of it and took a deep breath. "We decided on later for talking, yes? Let's keep it that way." Erik seemed to shake off whatever had happened and smiled at Charles. "You're going to love Steve. Assuming you haven't met him yet. I assume you haven't because he teaches American history regulars and you don't strike me as a regulars kid."

Charles shrugged on his blazer and threw his messenger bag over his neck as they walked out the door. He smiled modestly and seemed to decide… "If you think that about me, you should meet my father."

Erik's eyes beamed at Charles. "I'd love to."


	5. Innocence

When Steve heard the door open, he acknowledged to himself that Erik was home, but continued to search through the fridge for something that wasn't half eaten thanks to Tony's midnight snacks. At the sound of two pairs of footsteps, the fridge door slammed.

A light distant voice echoed through the house. "Wait. You're _sure_ this is a house and not a mall?"

Steve could hear Erik's soft laughter and knew the kid was blushing. Always so modest. Thank god Tony hadn't ruined him. "Tony…well teaching is his side job."

Steve smirked. True enough. He could hear Jarvis activating as the other boy probably bumped into the wall. He heard the shock and listened to Erik explain. There was such fondness in his voice, it took everything he had not to run out there to see who this visitor was. When was the last time Erik brought someone home? Not since-

Steve jumped out of hiding upon hearing Jarvis speak up. "Erik! How can you bring someone home and introduce them to Jarvis before me!"

Jarvis voiced his apologizes while Steve watched Erik cautiously take the young boy's hand to walk to the kitchen. Erik smiled at the extremely nervous and now twitching boy who looked like he wanted to rip his hand out of Erik's and grip it tighter at the same time. Erik whispered something in his ear and Steve saw the boy's eyes glance to his left hand. He then relaxed a bit and moved closer to Erik. The way they fit together made Steve want to grab Tony's camera. A flash went off and suddenly Tony was smirking from the corner. "That. That was irresistible. Are you out now then? Because you two are great. You picked a date for the wedding yet?"

Erik pulled Charles into a protective hug and Steve could've _sworn_ he heard Erik growl. "I swear to god, Tony. I'm not letting you speak like that around Charles. I'm not going to let you _be _around Charles. You're an asshole."

Tony pushed off from where he was leaning against the wall and strolled over to sling his arm around Steve's shoulders. "Aw, come on. I'm not that bad."

Steve elbowed him in the stomach and pushed him away. "You said Charles? Well Tony, I don't believe you've made the best impression and I'm taking Erik's side here. You're an asshole."

Tony made his way past Steve's push to kiss him on the cheek. "But you love me."

Steve answered with a glare, then returned his attention to Charles who had pushed his way out of Erik's arms and was standing not too tall, but he was close. "I…It's nice to meet you, Mr. Rogers. From what I hear backstage, you're the one all the girls are after."

It was Tony's turn to be upset. "Used to be me but then-"

"They realized you're an asshole." Tony and Steve glared at each other some more.

Charles was smiling now. He looked rather relaxed and wrapped an arm around Erik, seeming at peace with himself. Erik brushed Charles's hair back then looked to Steve and Tony. "I'm gonna show him around. You guys stay out of the way or I'll have Jarvis keep you in separate rooms tonight and you know Jarvis likes me best."

A voice chimed from above. "Of course, Erik." Tony grumbled and Steve said something about not minding too much. They began to argue about things Erik didn't care to listen to and dragged Charles down the hallway.

Charles's arm was around his waist as they walked and Erik was playing with the hair on the back of Charles's neck. "Why didn't you drop the accent?"

Charles looked away, normal accent returning with Steve and Tony gone. "Not sure… I guess it's…" He blushed a shade redder than Erik had ever seen. "I suppose it's my way of showing intimacy."

Erik's face flickered between extreme fondness and worry. "You drop the accent for Moira."

Charles looked away, shame stabbing at his heart. "Yes. Well. Moira and I…we…" He sighed. "I really don't know. I'm so sorry, Erik." Erik ran his finger down the middle of Charles's neck to the beginning of his spine as they _still_ walked down the damn long hallway to Erik's room.

Erik shrugged with a laugh as Charles shivered at his touch. "No, don't apologize. There's a lot going on in your head right now. Bound to be even more confusion in your heart."

Charles felt his heart squeeze. He really hadn't expected Erik to be so sentimental. "Mm there is a lot going on in my head, but I don't believe it's what you're speaking of."

Erik stopped walked and threw his arms in the air. "Do you see? You just…one moment you're practically hiding behind me with your tail tucked between your legs and then you're all but slipping your hands down my pants!" Charles grinned slyly, but heart skipped a beat at the imagery of Erik's words and found himself glancing down at Erik's crotch just long enough for them both to blush. Erik moved to Charles's side and continued to lead him down the hall, hand at the small of his back and Charles already arching into the touch. "Sorry. I'm not exactly being fair to y… well you're not being fair to me. I'm not quite sure if it's okay to joke about such things or if I should be avoiding them. You react differently every time."

Charles snuggled into Erik as they finally fucking stopped at a door. "Don't worry about me. Just be you. That'd be perfect."

Erik grinned as if he were laughing at an inside joke Charles wasn't in on. "Perfect transition then." He reached for the doorknob and hesitated. "Let me warn you, I'm in the middle of working on something so it might be kind of…overwhelming."

The door opened to…well Charles wasn't quite sure _what_ it was at first. Colors everywhere. Pictures pinned to walls, papers, sketches…sketches. Charles couldn't even look at the rest of the room as he stared at the wall covered in drawings. He'd turned absolutely white and could barely move. He thought he could hear Erik asking what was wrong, but he just kept walking forward until he could see the picture that resembled Erik up close. Sure enough, the style matched the signature. He slumped a bit, but Erik caught him in a tight grip that was stronger than he had expected. "Charles…Charles? Charles, what the hell is wrong? Are you alright? What happened? What is it? Charles, can you hear me?"

Charles blinked a few times and sat on the bed. Surely Erik wouldn't ask. Not if Charles didn't want to talk about it. "M'fine. Sorry just…I don't…can't talk about it right now. I…later. I will definitely tell you…later."

Erik sat down next to him on the bed, always such slow movements, as if Charles were a frightened animal he would scare away. And really, that description wasn't far from what Erik imagined Charles felt. "Considering we're alone, I'm not sure why you're saying later, but if you don't want to talk about it it's…fine. Um, I'll just pretend that didn't… Did I ever tell you I program video games?" Charles shook his head and Erik, though still worried, found himself filled with energy for his story telling dreams.

"You see, this here, the picture you were looking… um that's Magneto, and he's a human magnet and controls metals. I think he's going to end up being the villain. This is Mystique and she…" Erik continued for some time, explaining characters and their relations to each other. He eventually came to a point where he was ranking books above movies and video games above books. "…because when it comes down to it, movies just shove what they want you to see and think in your face. Books at least leave some things up to interpretation and video games, well you _are_ the main character. It's easily the most interactive experience! You're literally choosing your own path and you become a part of the story and I just…think it's beautiful."

Charles tugged Erik onto the bed when he'd finished his speech. He'd been running around the room pointing to different scraps of character descriptions and sketches. "You're beautiful." Erik sat carefully in the bed, seeing Charles's curious and scared eyes. "Is it okay if I-"

Erik nodded slowly. "Anything you want, Charles." Erik remained still as Charles moved closer. Erik seemed to understand what Charles was doing and, though it was a bit uncomfortable, he remained still and allowed Charles to explore the new territory he was stepping into. Erik had to stifle a laugh as Charles's hand first ran over Erik's chest. "Nope, no boobs."

Charles smiled softly. "Mm lets me get closer to you." Erik smiled as Charles's hands kept moving and it took everything he had in him not to gasp when Charles brushed his hip. Charles pushed Erik slowly back to lie down. Charles sat on his knees, blue eyes shining. Charles licked his lip and tugged his lower lip into his mouth to bite on it. Erik coughed and Charles blinked, understanding that Erik had hidden a moan rather well, but Charles was used to himself making such valiant efforts. He rewound the past few second to think what he'd done. He chuckled as he recognized his habit as the source. Again, his tongue flicked out across his lips and Charles watched Erik's eyes follow the movement. He laughed, but it faded a bit as he moved to lie down, not beside, but on top of Erik.

Erik saw the extreme conflict in his eyes as he hesitated to let their hips come into contact. Erik pushed up on his elbows to bring his mouth to Charles's ear. "Nothing you don't want to do. Don't force anything, it's fine."

Charles pushed Erik's face away with his cheek, eyes still wavering with the decision. "Lie back." Erik did as commanded.

Erik's eyes bulged for a second as the air was forced from his lungs. Charles had moved his arms and just fell onto Erik, face hidden in his arms on top of Erik's chest. Erik tried not to laugh but…the way Charles did things was overly endearing. "Shhh. You're alright, Charles. It's alright." Charles mumbled something with his face still buried in his arms. "Can't hear you."

He brought his face up and Erik saw a hint of tears that he wasn't sure were good or bad but didn't have time as Charles asked, "How much would you hate me if I said I have to go now?"

Erik laughed and immediately stopped when he saw Charles squirm since they were still fully in contact. Erik wished Charles could feel as comfortable and wonderful as he did right now. "I don't think I could ever hate you. Now get up before I have to get off in more ways than one."

Charles flushed, but shot Erik a mischievous smile as he stood.

-x-

The ride in the car was a mess of radio station changes; Erik insisting on alt radio, Charles trying to remember the frequency of his favorite Broadway station because he had it saved in his car, but didn't actually know it. Which made Erik challenge that it couldn't be his favorite station if he didn't know the frequency. Hand slapping over the tuner. Swerving on Erik's part. Panicking on Charles's. Until they finally pulled up to the school and said their goodbyes much the same way as the night before.

Charles couldn't stop thinking about him. He drove to where Raven was waiting in a trance. Was he really…could he truly feel so strongly so soon? Surely he wasn't in-

"Dude, Charles. I am _not_ letting you drive if you're a love sick puppy. Emphasis on sick. Get out of the driver's seat. I'm not letting you kill us cause you'd break your new girl's heart. Assuming she's as into you as you are into her. If she is, get married tomorrow. If she's not, maybe I should let you drive. You'll kill yourself faster. Maybe I'll just walk."

Charles blinked, stared, and shook his head followed by a face palm. "How long was I just sitting here?"

Raven checked her watch. "About 3 minutes now."

Charles sighed and reluctantly gave up the driver's seat, cautioning Raven as much as he could that if she messed up his car at all, he'd yell empty threats at her, which is really all he could do.

The ride was quiet for a while and Raven figured Charles was in a good mood… "Charles, you know I'm not still upset about Mom, right? I mean, I've grown up with it. I'm used to it. We don't have to do this anymore."

Charles turned white and snapped out of whatever thought process he was having. "R-raven. What are you talking about?"

Her eyebrows came together as she realized just how insane Charles had been driving himself over the matter. "Charles. Listen. Maybe, when Dad brought me home, Mom wasn't too thrilled. Maybe it was a bad time. Maybe she's still upset that I survived and her second child didn't. It doesn't matter. I've grown up with a father who loves me and a brother who loves me so much he smothers me in it and almost kills me. I know I'm adopted. I'm a sophomore in high school for god's sake. You don't need to protect me anymore. People should know we're related."

Charles had gone absolutely still. "Who've you been talking to?"

Raven sighed. "A friend. But you don't have to-"

"Do they know?"

"Charles. Surprisingly enough, I know how to keep secrets when I'm asked to. No. No one fucking knows you're my brother. Just how you've always wanted it to be. I just told someone a vague _something_ because sometimes I need to _talk to people_ without being hidden away! And maybe he makes more sense than you and-"

"Maybe he's better than me." Raven had put the car in park and Charles quickly climbed out after he spoke.

She gathered her things and ran out the door, almost forgetting to take the keys out. "Charles! Charles you know that's not…" but the door was already closed. Maybe it was true. Maybe she did think that. Raven walked by where their father had an arm around Charles, leading him to the study. She went to her room and called a familiar number and heard a familiar voice. Maybe…

-x-

Charles didn't say a word to his dad. Couldn't. They just walked to the study, set up a game of chess, and stayed silent. It was good, relaxing, distracting. After knocking his king over in defeat, Charles hugged his dad, still in silence, and went up to his room. He pulled the covers up around him, but his eyes wouldn't close.

He mumbled a quiet "fuck everything" and fumbled around for his phone and that fucking piece of paper that he knew the exact location of without his eyes having to adjust. He clicked the screen of his phone on to read the number off the card. It was a good number. Just enough repeating digits and not too many repea- What the fuck. When you realize you're gay do you just become attracted to everything? Charles typed the number in and then stopped. What was he _thinking_? Not just about calling right now, but his thoughts. What was wrong with him?

Charles sat still in bed for a few minutes, utterly scared of himself. Scared of what he heard in his own thoughts. Scared of what it might mean, what he might become. In a few more minutes he would've shook it off and dismissed it as over reacting, but he heard the voice from his phone.

"Charles? Charles are you there? You alright?"

_When the fuck did he press call?_ "Yes. Yes I'm here. Erik, I'm here."


	6. Iris

The drive to school was not too pleasant. Charles was quiet, but the fear seemed to have gone from his eyes and was now replaced with quiet thoughtfulness. It was truly a topic he'd needed to rethink, but had been so in habit of accepting as it is. Maybe there was a lot going on and this was an unnecessary bit to add on top of it. Though this was also something that was wrong, that had _been_ wrong, and that Charles had thought was fine.

When their mother had her miscarriage, Charles was young and hadn't understood. After that, Sharon Xavier had given up trying to get pregnant anymore and resigned herself to just Charles, trying to forget about the young girl who could have been. A few years later, when Brian brought home the young and helpless Raven, Sharon could see her as nothing more than an attempt at replacement. Charles and Raven bonded almost immediately with each other and when Charles noticed how their mother treated Raven, he did all he could to quiet the fact that Raven was adopted. He truly thought it would help. Maybe even Sharon would forget, and think Raven was just a friend who slept over a lot. Charles did everything in his power to keep up this one plan he came up with, and it was the only thing he knew as he grew up. It was a goal he'd long endeavored and a goal not easily given up.

Brian loved his son, and could see the compassion and efforts of the young boy. He thought, maybe the boy was right. Maybe he understood Raven in a way an adult couldn't. So he allowed Charles to go on, but it reached a point where he wasn't sure it was helping more than it was hurting. By then, it was already too late and Raven was enrolled under a fake name.

It was Charles who kept up the rules at school. No contact, no sharing of information about friends, nothing that showed they knew each other. Nothing.

Force of habit, Charles pulled up to where he dropped off Raven to walk. He felt horrible and wished she could drive instead of him, that he would walk, but she insisted she liked walking anyway. Today Charles watched as she walked toward the school, wondering if this was necessary, wondering if their mother's opinion even bothered her anymore. It was Charles's senior year, did they really have much to lose?

Charles got out of the car to walk inside, back tracking over his thoughts and realizing it was a little insensitive to think that his graduation meant anything when Raven would still be in school. Really, it was up to her and she seemed to want things to change so maybe they should start telling each other about-

A hand wrapped around his arm. "Charles, jesus. Walk faster, would you? Where are you going that's so important?"

Charles glanced around furtively and shook Erik's hand off. "I walk faster when I'm…" He struggled to find a word. Paranoid, nervous, worried, thinking… "Never mind. Just…what on earth are you doing?"

Erik had fallen into step beside him and shrugged. "Well a more accurate question is what I'm _not_ doing. All of which are playing in my head right now under the title, 'How to Greet My Boyfriend.' That's actually a movie. Coming out next month." Charles managed to turn pale and blush at the same time. Erik glanced down at Charles as his grin faded. "You still not…it's fine. I just want to help anyway I can. You let me know." Erik's hand twitched to grab Charles's, but he somehow resisted.

Erik began to reluctantly walk away, trying not to think of hugs or kisses. "Erik!" Again, Charles glanced around, but really, no one was listening. That didn't stop him from whispering, "Can we go to your house again tonight?"

Erik walked away without a word, but a smug smile on his face. They didn't have rehearsals tonight, but what they did have was plenty of time.

-x-

Erik already knew what going to happen. They both did, but Erik knew for sure. Charles had never thought much of men, but Erik was…well Erik was choreographing everything he wanted to do to Charles. And maybe that was a bit messed up, but you can't blame him. His last relationship, while shallow, was…well they had fun. But Erik's still glad he moved away from Loki after they broke up. Some ex's just weren't worth the whining. Loki was fun to have around, but when the boy was sad, the boy was _sad_. Erik thought back, not very fondly on their relationship but was happy to compare it to Charles because really, Loki wasn't his type. Erik looked forward in every way to how things would be different, and _better_ with Charles.

-x-

Charles's thoughts were really rather chaste. Well, compared to Erik's. His 5th period office aid was actually Mr. Rogers's conference period and Charles decided to stop by. Charles knocked and entered timidly. "Hello, Mr. Rogers. I hope you're having a good day!"

The side of Steve's mouth pulled up in a smirk. "Okay, look kid. I get that you're all about respect, but I try to avoid being called Mr. Rogers as often as I can. Sure the regular kids aren't allowed the casual acquaintance of calling me by my first name, but you're dating my son and I like you. You're more than allowed." Charles blushed. "Erik gave Tony and I a talking to, so we know that public places aren't exactly your friend right now. Trust me, I get that. You could say I'm old fashioned. Now kid, you have it _easy_. Erik is understanding. Taking it slow, right? I met Tony first day of school senior year, he asked me to prom the next week. Now I could try to describe to you the scene he made, Tony Stark, asking someone to prom, but I don't need to relieve those memories that vividly. Maybe I'll have him show you pictures later. He had Clint filming the whole thing, bastard." Steve clapped his hands over his mouth. "Sorry, we're at school. The point I'm trying to make, you don't have to come out. Erik is giving you the choice. It's up to you."

Charles began to realize all the long speeches this family made when you walked in their rooms, but he didn't mind too much. It was all new territory and Charles was a sponge for learning. It was actually a nice arrangement. They answered most of his questions without him even asking. Charles took a seat at the chair near Steve's desk. "Could you…maybe…tell me what it was like? Falling for Tony? Like…how did you know? How did you know you were…g-gay? I mean it's barely accepted now, how did you manage back then?"

Steve shrugged. "Let me remind you we're talking about Tony. Tony is bi, and was with a lot of people before we even met. One of the first things he said to me, was to ask if I was gay. Of course I said no, and acted appalled, but he knew it was a lie. I have no idea how he knew, but he knew."

Charles chuckled. "So the gaydar rumors are true."

Steve shrugged. "Maybe it's just Tony. After I said no, he figured he had to prove me wrong. He talked to one of his friends, and I assume one of his exes, Peggy. Arranged a date for us. Now don't get me wrong, Peggy Carter is an amazing woman."

If Charles was drinking something, he would've spit it up. "Wait, Ms. Carter? Like _the drama teacher, Ms. Carter?_"

Steve looked confused but nodded. "We were all teenagers once, Charles. No matter how long ago it seems to be. Tony says it's longer for me. That I'm too old for him. Tony's an idiot though, he's older than me. Anyway, I went out with Peggy, or I guess she's distilled enough fear in you that I should just call her Ms. Carter. Well she was…she was really something. She was like the female version of Tony. And I realized afterwards that was exactly why Tony picked her. When I confessed to Tony the date hadn't worked out, he set about with his prom decorations. Yes, this all happened within a week. The _first_ week of senior year. Tony Stark, ladies and gentleman."

Charles nodded, smiling fondly at everything but the thought of Tony and Ms. Carter and things he never needed to think about. Ms. Carter was basically the drama Hitler, but she had a soft spot for fondue, and no one minded splurging on some for dinner breaks. It was well worth it to save yourself from her wrath. Charles shook off the bad thoughts and returned to the good ones. "Thank you _so _much for your time…Steve…Are you sure I can't call you Mr. Rogers?"

Charles squirmed uncomfortably and Steve laughed. "I'll make you a deal, you call me Steve on every day I'm not wearing a sweater. If I'm wearing a sweater you can call me Mr. Rogers and I'll go around visiting my neighbors."

Charles smiled in a way that made his eyes shine, and Steve mentally patted Erik on the back. He found someone special here. "I have to go back to the office. I'll see you tonight." Charles's eyes grew wide at the slip up and his hand froze in spot where it was waving.

Steve laughed. "Oh, don't worry. We know what Erik gets up to and I doubt you'll be louder than-"

"BYE STEVE." And with that Charles was out the door, not wanting to hear the rest of that sentence. A feeling Charles hadn't felt in…well ever, came creeping up his spine and twisted his stomach. Jealousy.

Steve realized afterwards that he shouldn't have said anything, but Charles had been so easy to talk to he forgot the kid was fragile.

-x-

While waiting for 7th period to end, Charles learned what the actual problem with bisexuality is: if your boyfriend has an ex, it could be _anyone_ and you can't just limit it to boys or girls. And it could be multiple and god he had so many people to potentially be jealous of. People who were more comfortable with Erik. People who fell into relationships with him easier. Maybe Charles was just another pawn. Just another body to get in his bed. As many times as the thought ran across his mind, Charles just couldn't believe it to be true.

All thoughts of jealousy vanished when he spotted Erik waiting for him next to the jeep, the look in Erik's eyes not just enough to clear his worries, but to send his heart soaring into the sky. Impossible. Everything he felt about Erik was just impossible.

-x-

"So." Charles moved the pack of chess pieces on the floor around with his feet. "You just keep this in here all the time?"

Erik glanced down and then back at the road, correcting the wheel a bit. "Uh, yeah. Fuck. Can I just leave the alt station on? I can't drive to this shit."

Charles stared at Erik for a moment. "You can't drive…to this…_shit_?" Erik bit his tongue. Right. Drama kid in his car. Idiot. "Do you realize what this…this is _Wicked._ Everyone likes Wicked! Everyone! What do you mean you can't _drive_ to it?"

Erik saw that look in Charles's eyes that showed he wanted to give his opinion, but he didn't want to upset Erik. So he chose to just ignore the comments about The Wizard of Oz and answered the driving question. "Music helps me focus while I drive. Might save your life one day." Charles blushed at the casual suggestion of a long term relationship. "I thought it was all music that helped but today I learned it's not. So I need my alt station if you want to make it to the house alive." Charles gave in and tuned to Erik's favorite station. He'd now memorized both frequencies they used.

The music droned on in the background for a moment before Charles gave up on his impatience and asked. "Erik, how many people have you taken home?"

Erik glanced at Charles, deciding if this was okay to answer right now. Charles seemed genuinely curious and not upset. "Including you, three."

Charles was expecting more, and was pleasantly surprised. But he was an actor, Erik saw nothing but curiosity in his eyes. "And did you date more than that?"

Erik still wasn't sure why Charles felt the need to ask these questions, but if it helped he would answer. "No, just those two and you."

Charles continued his drilling. "Men or women?"

"One man, one woman."

"Which came first?"

"The chicken or the egg? Sorry, I just couldn't…um the man."

"Did he take your virginity?"

Erik slammed on the brakes literally and metaphorically. "Is that what you're getting at?" A bit of Charles's anxiety showed through despite himself. Erik sighed. "Yes. He did."

Charles bit his lip and looked away. "And the girl?"

Erik started the car up again. "No, we never got that intimate. I think she's still a virgin actually." Charles felt a bit lighter, knowing there was only one in the past. "Why is it so important you know about all my exes?"

Charles's eyebrows furrowed. "I…don't…well you know about mine."

Erik kept his eyes on the road, acknowledging Charles's face as too great a distraction. "Just Moira."

Charles stared at Erik. "Exactly."

Erik's lips fell open with a silent "Oh." Then he glanced at Charles. "And did you…?"

Charles turned red. "More times than I'd care to admit."

Erik laughed. "Then I guess we're equal."

Charles ran a hand through his hair. "_Hardly!_ You have experience with another man. I'm…I'm kind of starting over here." His voice trailed off a bit at the end, getting quieter and more unsure.

It was then that Erik had pulled into the drive way and put the car in park. He followed where Charles's fingers had combed through his hair and pressed a kiss to his forward. "I'll go as slow as you want." Charles got out of the car mumbling that he'd probably like it fast. Charles startled when Erik laughed, he hadn't thought he'd heard. Erik slung an arm around Charles and kissed the top of his head. "I'm new to you and you're new to me. The past means nothing. I'm starting over again with you."

They made their way silently to Erik's room, both well aware that Tony and Steve were still at school.

-x-

Erik gently shut the door behind him, his eyes focused on Charles. Instead of having the ceiling lights on, he simply turned on a lamp, just in case Charles was self-conscious of seeing too much and well, most people look better under dimmed light. He wanted this to be as smooth as possible.

Charles set his bag on the floor next to Erik's bed and reluctantly turned around. "How does one go about this?" he thought. "Do I sit on his bed? Should I take off my shirt first? Is that too forward?"

Before Charles could even attempt to answer his own inane questions, Erik's arms were moving to slip off his shirt. He paused for a moment, his eyes dark and then-

Erik quickly tugged the shirt off. Charles eyes widened to their fullest capacity at the sight of Erik. He definitely made a face that would alarm anyone.

Charles only thought of Erik as skinny at best. He was hiding abs under there this entire time? Goddamn him. He was so _definite_. He could even see the veins along his arms. Charles wondered if they were more prominent when Erik was - oh god.

Erik had one hand cupped on the side of his neck and his arm seemed positioned as if it were hiding something. "Charles…I should…" Charles simply patted the bed beside where he had sat and didn't interrupt. Erik sat, but still hadn't moved his arm. Charles was finding it rather hard to keep eye contact during, well, his sexual awakening. For men, at least. Erik seemed to be stuttering on words and in one gasp of breath it flew out. "I self-harm."

Charles gently took hold of Erik's free hand and squeezed it tightly. "N-not anything bad. Well not anymore, just. The occasional…hold my breath too long, scrape at the back of my neck, cut off air flow. God it sounds worse than it is. Or…maybe it doesn't." Erik's hand fell and Charles could see there were no marks where he'd been covering but there were a few scars on his chest which Charles assumed were for a conversation on another day.

Charles ran his hands through Erik hair. "You're beautiful. And you shouldn't need to do that, but it's not like I'm going to hate you for it."

Erik stared for a moment, an indescribable expression in his eyes. His kisses felt tenderer to Charles than they ever had before, like Erik was kissing with a purpose. He put his hand around Charles head, brushing past his cheek. Erik seemed relieved to get that over with and was no comfortable with his shirt off and quickly moved on to what tonight was intended for.

"Have you ever….?" Erik glanced down between Charles legs.

"H-have I what?"

He scoffed amusingly. His slight inexperience was endearing to Erik.

"…have you ever been sucked off?"

"Uhhmm, no….uhhh Moira and I never…"

"Lay down then", Erik whispered. "You'll like this."

Charles knew that he had been a huge tease before but this time it was different. He never let another man touch him. He never let himself be the receiver. His heart beat quickened at the thought of this.

Meanwhile Erik had been slowly tugging at the buttons of Charles' shirt and planting soft kisses down his chest and abdomen. He was slow and graceful. Erik's thin lips were surprisingly textured. Charles couldn't believe that he was growing harder by the second with only the sensation of Erik's mouth on him.

Erik unbuckled his belt and undid the button and zipper of his pants. He would be lying if he said he wasn't anxious to see how Charles looked under there. He wore navy blue boxer briefs. Of course, Erik thought as he laughed to himself, how classy.

He slid down Charles' pants and looked up at him. Charles was slightly panting and his hands were clenching the bed sheets. Erik could see the outline of Charles' erection through his underwear. He took a few seconds to study it and gently traced down along his cock with two fingers. Charles let out a soft whimper. He wasn't sure whether or not he'd be able to control himself with Erik.

Erik finally took off his briefs. He grabbed hold of the side of his cock and began kissing it starting from the base, leaving his cock slippery after each kiss. When he reached the head, Charles let out an "ahhh". Realizing he could get off with Erik's kisses alone made him shiver. He clenched the bed sheets some more.

Taking note of this, Erik placed his hand over Charles' fist hoping to calm him down.

"Shhhh…" he whispered.

Charles released the sheets and relaxed his breathing. He closed his eyes because the sight of Erik on him was getting to be too much.

Erik knew his cue and began mouthing his cock. Charles could feel Erik's hot breath on him. He placed his tongue under him and began sucking the head. Charles winced as he prepared himself for more. Erik gained speed as he bobbed his head back and forth to take more of Charles in. Charles could feel himself wanting to clench the sheets again but instead grabbed a hold of Erik's hand. He knew he was near the edge.

By this time Erik had taken all of him in his mouth. His sucking was deeper. Charles couldn't help but to buck his hips towards Erik. He could feel Erik's tongue moving around him. Charles squirmed and his panting became more audible. He wondered if Erik was sweating just as much.

Erik abruptly picked his mouth up which felt unbelievable to Charles. He placed a hand over Erik's head, gently grabbing his hair, his cock twitching in Erik's mouth. Erik lowered his mouth slowly until he finally gave Charles one last tug with his mouth. A long and hard tug.

Charles felt himself release. He bucked his hips again going deeper into Erik. His muscles felt tense. He couldn't help but fuck his mouth a little.

Erik let out a "mmhhh" from under his breath as though trying to let Charles know it was ok. He swallowed Charles' cum. He tasted sweet the entire time.

Erik wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he looked down at Charles. His face was flushed pink; he was out of breath and trying to bring back his composure. Erik smirked a little at a job well done. He swept Charles' sweat damped hair away from his face and gave him a gentle kiss.

Charles stayed still for a while, staring at the ceiling, trying so hard to look at Erik, to be fucking normal for him. But it was…it was a little shocking. Wonderful, but… Charles's shirt was open but not off and Erik's hand wandered its way up Charles's chest until he was lying next to him. "Charles, are you okay?" Charles's lips were in a taut line and he gave a sharp shake of his head. He couldn't say it. He couldn't say it was still uncomfortable. He just couldn't admit it and he couldn't look Erik in the eye because he knew what Erik expected from tonight and Charles just…_couldn't._

Without looking away from that one spot on the ceiling, Charles pulled his briefs back on and his pants before turning on his side to cuddle into Erik. "I'm _so_ sorry."

Erik pushed Charles away a moment to make eye contact. "No, don't you _dare _apologize. Charles, I told you. Whatever you're ready for."

Charles could tell the way Erik was laying, his hips away from Charles. "Fuck that. You didn't get anything from tonight. And I'm just leaving you like…and I can't. And I don't even know what to _do_. And even if I did, I can't and I-"

"I swear to god, if you try to apologize again… Charles. Listen to me. I didn't ask you here tonight because I needed you in my bed. I asked you here tonight because I needed

"I swear to god, if you try to apologize again… Charles. Listen to me. I didn't ask you here tonight because I needed you in my bed. I asked you here tonight because I needed _you_. Just you. If you were ready tonight, I'd have been amazed. It's barely been a week. I keep saying I wouldn't push you, but maybe I have a little and that's not really fair to you. Now I'm gonna go brush my teeth like five times and when I come back I'm going to kiss you."

Charles could see the sincerity in his eyes and Charles appreciated the words, but when Erik went into the bathroom Charles heard the shower turn on and he heard…

He sat up in Erik's bed and brought his knees to his chest. His eyes were dry as he stared into the air, guilt and self-loathing poisoning his every breath.

-x-

Erik kept true to his word, he did kiss Charles, chastely. Charles looked into Erik's eyes, so much passing between them without a word. Erik nodded, answering a question that didn't need to be asked, and grabbed his keys. The drive back to the school to Charles's car wasn't an unpleasant one. It was companionable and Erik kept on hand on Charles's the entire, dangerous, time, rubbing circles on the back of his hand. It was enough to keep Erik's turns a little wobbly and keep Charles scared enough to forget for a few seconds. Charles got out of the car with a sad sort of giggle and Erik followed him out, pressing him against the mini cooper and giving him a 'right proper English snog' as Charles had called it afterwards.

As per usual, Charles watched Erik go, thankful that Erik never asked about Charles's home, and left to pick up Raven. Though this time tonight, when Charles sat opposite his father for a game of chess, the game had been postponed while Brian hugged his son tightly and sobs ran down both their faces, regardless that Brian knew nothing of the problem. His son crying so desperately was enough of a catalyst for him.

_((Hey guys! Sorry this update took so much longer than the others It's come to the point where the collab between me and another author has started so a few chapters will have longer upload dates. She is currently 'archiehicox' on tumblr, though you may know her as 'hardwires'. LOVE HER. SHE IS WRITING YOU SMUT. I have a few chapters after this one lined up so keep your eyes peeled! Thanks SO MUCH for reading. Love you!))_


	7. Unbeautiful

Tonight. Somehow, Charles had gotten last night out of his head and had moved on to a new day. He was going to through with it this time. He was ready and oh _god _did he want Erik. Charles couldn't stop smiling at the thought. It'd actually been quite some time since he and Moira had been together like that and after the…um…consistency of it, Charles was…excited…no. God, what was he thinking? He was just a giant bundle of incoherent energy. His thoughts sounded like he was a twelve year old. A slutty twelve year old. Which he was at one point, so it wasn't unfamiliar territory. He sighed as he sat in class. He could remember how Raven would slap her hands over her ears when he talked about Moira. If she knew how he thought about Erik she would be shoving knives in her ears. It really was…odd. To think about being with Erik after being so used to being with Moira. Charles worried he'd treat Erik like a girl…and then wondered if he would possibly like that. It was all quite embarrassing. No one could hear him, but he embarrassed himself all the same.

The bell rang and Charles snapped out of it and walked into the hallway. Then he decided it'd be a good idea to remember tonight was also opening night. Somehow, it wasn't as worrisome as it used to be. A night with Erik was much more daunting. It was Friday night. It'd been less than a week. Just like how Tony knew about Steve after a week, Erik and Charles seemed to be going even faster. Charles found himself…not really minding. It's felt like it's been weeks, months even. Like they've known each other forever. Maybe tonight would be a good night to…tell everyone. _Everyone_. Including Raven. And maybe his dad. He knew his dad wouldn't care, but something about telling his dad felt extremely finite and official. It was more frightening to imagine telling Raven. Moira was their only mutual friend and Moira had taken it just fine. But then, Moira had figured it out. He hadn't told her. He hasn't told anyone yet. Moira and Erik both knew. They both knew when even Charles didn't know. That was hardly fair… Fuck. Charles looked up and realized he'd been wandering through the halls without thinking. He found himself in front of Tony's door when he should be at the front office for office aid. A familiar hand ruffled his hair. "Something wrong?" Charles looked toward Erik but his eyes were still focused far away, imagining all the people he knew and all the ways they would react all the things they'd say the things they'd do the things they- "Charles!" Erik's hand slapped his cheek lightly. "Snap out of it. What's wrong?"

"WhatifItoldthemtonight." He blurted it out in one breath that sounded more like a sigh. Erik's hand twitched to grab Charles's, but there were still people in the hall and he knew Charles…

Erik glanced down at where Charles had grabbed his hand. No one looked, but Charles didn't even check. Erik put his hand on Charles's cheek. "Sh, let me talk to Tony for a second. I'll be right back. Don't move." Erik was in the room and back out faster than Charles could blink. The tardy bell rang and Erik walked Charles to the front office to be sure Charles wouldn't be in trouble for skipping class. Upon seeing him, they insisted he go to a nurse or counselor. Charles couldn't remember what had been said, but Erik managed to get Charles to himself and Charles thought he remembered that growl again. That protective sound that was so animalistic but made Charles feel strangely safe. Charles blinked again and suddenly they were in the dressing room. "Charles. You need to breathe. Please. You're scaring me."

The door closed and Charles's eyes welled with tears. "_I'm_ scaring you? No. No everything. _Everything_ is scaring _me_. I have to tell her and my dad and everyone. And everyone will know and they'll. Like John did. Everything will change. Everyone will change. Thank god I'm not in any P.E. classes or I'd be forced to change in the showers or something. And they'll just-"

Erik's hand went over Charles's mouth and Charles's eyes _finally_ focused on Erik's. He looked at Charles, amused. "It doesn't work like that. I was in soccer for a while. People knew. They didn't care. I didn't stare at them. I didn't try to make moves on them. Things were fine. A few freshman hid from me for a few weeks, but they got over it. They joked about it with me. It became a fact. I mean, sure occasionally people are assholes but…I've found ways to deal with that. Hence why I'm at this school since sophomore year and not in the other district." Erik laughed. "That was a damn good punch. You should've seen it. That guy was out for _hours_." Charles didn't look very comforted. "Sorry. But what I'm saying is, you'll be fine. Your circle of friends, well they're generally all in drama. You couldn't have found a more accepting crowd. You do realize they all know I'm bi? Have you seen them look at me funny once?"

Charles expected to be saying yes, but…he really hadn't noticed anyone treating Erik differently. "…no. Emma seemed a bit disappointed but beside that…"

Erik spit up a bit of laughter. "Yeah, she came on to me almost as soon as she saw me walk into class. I guess I'm 'her type.'"

Charles scoffed. "Don't flatter yourself. She did the same to me. Actually she never really stopped."

Erik's eyes narrowed for a moment, then calmed upon remembering he was the one alone with Charles. "You never gave her a chance?"

Charles's eyebrows made a weird movement Erik couldn't really describe as he said "No…well I'd been with Moira since before I met Emma and Moira and I only broke up recently and then…I met you."

The answer wasn't exactly a comfort. "So you're saying you would have."

Charles looked scared for a moment. "Erik. _Erik." _The rage was boiling in jealously and Charles had no idea what to do. "Um. Erik. Calm…calm your mind. Er…"

His expression changed in a heartbeat. Erik started cracking up. "Calm my mind? Jesus, Charles. You're living in the wrong time period."

Charles smiled and snuggled closer into Erik. "No, I'm living in _your_ time period."

Erik kissed Charles's nose and watch him blush. "You don't _have_ to tell anyone." Erik's voice was monotone.

Charles backed away a bit. "Don't say that. You want me to and you shouldn't lie. No, I don't have to tell anyone. But you should know my biggest pet peeve is dishonesty. You want to shove your tongue down my throat in the middle of the hallway. I don't want you to pretend you're something you're not. I'm falling for _you_. Not someone who is trying to protect me regardless of how I…"

Charles froze. Raven. That must be exactly how Raven felt. Erik's hand brushed through his hair. "You keep doing that. It worries me. There's something going on in there," he tapped Charles's forehead, "that you're not telling me about. You keep saying later."

Charles pushed the thought away to worry about…well, later. "I could say the same for you." He pulled at Erik's turtleneck and immediately flung apologies at him as Erik's face went stoic.

Erik's hand lingered at his throat. "I guess…since I didn't say everything last night…it's hard to say. So bear with me. Um…I…well I told you I was in foster care. Not all houses are as good as the last. They get progressively worse as you get older and start being an adult and not an adorable little kid. Well except Steve and Tony but, well it's…easy to assume I didn't have the best childhood. That's an excuse. God, I can't even talk about it with you. I've never really…told anyone before." Erik leaned back and took a few deep breaths. Charles didn't say a word. Just kept rubbing circles on the back of Erik's hand. Erik's free hand moved to his throat and ran from his collar bone to above his adam's apple. Back and forth, agonizingly slow. Generally, Charles probably would've been…attracted to such a motion, but something about the way Erik did it felt…sad. "I think too much. That's why I'm usually quiet. But you," Erik glanced down at Charles with a smile that was fond, but not completely happy. "You make me forget to think. That's as much of a blessing as it is a curse.

"Something always lingers. The worst parts of everything I've seen always stay with me. Not the memory of it, but the feeling of it. I remember the sadness but I rarely remember why. It's just…defined me. I've reveled in the pain for as long as I can remember. It's a part of me. It _is_ me. Rage, pain, anger: always lingering somewhere right beneath my skin. My tolerance for it is high, obviously, but sometimes it can get to be too much. And when it does." Erik stopped talking, eyes trained to the ceiling. He was always rather twitchy, but he was stone still now. The words hanging in the air, waiting to be said, and Erik unable to say them.

Charles watched, waited, and realized why Erik was so still. He placed a hand on Erik's chest. "Erik. Breathe. Oh god, Erik please. Are you alright should I. Please breathe."

Without turning his head, Erik slowly let out his breath and just as slowly breathed back in. Erik was lost in it now, the shame. Telling Charles was…it was the too much he'd mentioned. It wasn't the too much he expected, but regardless, it hurt. A lot. He squeezed Charles's hand to let him know he was alright, but it was still too hard to say. Maybe he'd said it bluntly last night, but somehow giving only part of the story felt more like a lie. He forced out the last sentence. "When the emotional pain is too much, it helps beyond belief for physical pain to join it."

Charles gripped Erik's hand tighter and wrapped his arms around him tightly. "Oh, Erik. I'm not angry with you if that's what you're expecting. Please look at me. You've been helping me and I'll help you, just…please don't ever take it too far. Please don't leave me, Erik." His voice broke. Charles hadn't expected the thought to be so affecting but tears were suddenly pouring from his eyes and Charles found himself sobbing at the thought.

Erik's lips pressed against the top of Charles's head where Charles's face was buried into Erik's chest. Erik smiled a little, breathing returning to normal as the words were out and everything was fine again. "You cry too much."

Charles managed to laugh a bit and wiped his jacket sleeves across his eyes. "Your fault." He sniffled and Erik managed to stretch and reach the tissue box on the chair next to them.

Erik glanced down and playfully pushed Charles off of him. "Ugh, gross. You've got snot all over your face."

Charles's cheeks turned red and he turned away from Erik, pulling tissues out to wipe all over his face. Erik ruffled Charles's stupid ginger hair again. "Kidding. But not about the hair. You seriously need to dye this back as soon as the show is over.

Charles smiled and faced Erik. "What do you have against gingers? I think you'd make a magnificent ginger. I bet when you're not clean shaven your facial hair is ginger."

Erik stared at Charles and ran a finger across his own jaw, knowing that Charles's guess was actually correct. "You have five minutes til the bell rings."

Erik walked over and brushed away a tear that had made its way to Charles's cheek passed all the tissues. Charles's eyes shone into Erik's before he turned to face the mirror. "So you're not going to admit you're a ginger?"

Erik sighed. "Clearly you already know so why should I bother saying anything?"

Charles smirked. "Then you like my hair now, don't you?" When Erik didn't say anything, Charles turned to find Erik's mouth slightly agape. He turned to the mirror with a look of satisfaction. "Yes, I thought so. Laughing to hide the attraction. You're not a good liar, Erik."

Erik lied back on the couch and folded his arms under his head, closing his eyes. "Not to you, at least. You better hurry. You've only got thirty seconds til the bell and I have a free period next so I can take my time."

Charles huffed and stared at his eyes that were now less red but still sensitive to wind hitting them. "I take it Tony isn't going to be mad you skipped?"

Erik studied Charles for a moment and decided the truth was fine. "95% sure he thinks we're having sex right now."

Charles's eyes widened as the bell rang. "Fuck. I am on the opposite side of the school. I need to get to Professor Odin's class."

Erik looked a bit terrified. "You have class with…Yeah you should run. Same place as yesterday after school?"

Charles nodded and bolted from the room. Erik had a bad feeling about Charles going to that class right now, but he couldn't pin down why. Beside the fact that Charles's teacher was the father of his ex. Clearly that had no effect previously, so why the bad feeling now?

-x-

Loki sprawled across the cushions his dad kept in his room. Why they were there, none of the students knew. Fuck that, Loki knew his father was a lazy ass. Slept on his off period. Loki was "sick" and Odin didn't trust him home alone for more than an hour. So during Thor and Odin's school hours, Loki was stuck in the classroom. He'd graduated last year and was now not going to college. He had better things to do than be locked in classrooms all year long. Things like not being thrown in prison all year long. Loki couldn't help it if he was a kleptomaniac. He enjoyed causing chaos and people made it so easy. It was so amusing. The tardy bell rang and a mess of a kid ran through the door and into his seat. Fucking most orange hair Loki'd ever seen. Dyed of course, but still. Some statement. Either a drama kid or gay. Or both. His eyes were red, crying. Maybe he was Loki's type. Then again, practically anyone was as long as they had a bit of sass to them. With hair like that, this one had to. Loki got up and sat in the empty seat behind the kid. Then he noticed the smell. It was a scent he hadn't come by in about a year and one he'd hoped to run into but he did _not_ expect to find it like this. So this was Erik's new fuck toy. Well maybe Loki would have more fun than he bargained for.

Odin barely looked at Loki while he lectured about stars or whatever the jumbled snores were coming out of his mouth, so Loki spent the period teasing Charles. Running fingers down his neck, tugging on his shirt, stretching his leg forward to reach his. And the way the kid would jump each time! It was like middle school all over again. The lecture ended a few minutes before the bell and Charles turned furiously. "Who are you and what are you doing?"

Loki leaned back and ignored the question. "How's Erik?" Loki recognized the frightened look in his face. "Oh that is too cute. You haven't told anyone yet. You realize if you cuddle close together during school hours you smell like each other? Or are you a virgin. Oh this is too good. I really didn't peg Erik to go for innocent ones. Then again I didn't peg Erik at all. It was much more real than that." Charles almost threw up. _This_ was Erik's ex? The black slicked back hair and what could basically be a second skin of leather? Again Loki laughed. "Oh you figured out who I am? And just for fun, let's throw in that I'm Odin's eldest son." He busted out laughing. "You're good! So many expressions. Wonderful. Should I tell you more about Erik? I'm sure you only know the good stuff. So patient, protective. He didn't tell you about the guy whose leg he broke? No? Oh that was one of my exes. Erik wanted a turn with me. Broken leg, can't fuck. And then we rode off into the sunset. He's really very romantic, wouldn't you say? Three wonderful years, we had. Funny my dad is at the same school he's graduating from. Almost like destiny for me to be here."

The bell had rung but Charles couldn't move. He was hypnotized by the words. By the image of the Erik who had been with Loki. The lie that he was now. Erik had seemed so pure. Charles wouldn't have thought that…if this was his first ex, then who the hell was the girl? Charles just imagined what a bitch she must be. What was Charles getting himself into tonight? What if it wasn't intimate at all? What if Erik only liked…

Loki leaned forward with a whisper. "If my dad wasn't in the room, I would tell you all the different ways we went at it. Erik was easily the kinkiest sex I ever had." Charles was quiet, staring off in the distance, but Loki whistled as if calling a dog and somehow, for some reason, Charles's eyes locked on those devilish green eyes. "I could give you a preview first. I'm assuming you haven't been together yet. Daddy's sleeping so if we snuck off, he'd never know. I'm guessing Erik is waiting for you? Stand him up. Play hard to get. He likes that. Loves it. Loves catching you and tying you to the bed. That was a good night. Well that whole weekend actually…"

"_Shut up!_" Charles finally managed to stand, but Loki was far from done.

"You're upset. You're going to run to him now? Should I follow you? You could lead me right to him. Then we can catch up overnight. Oh now _that_ I wouldn't mind. Jarvis was always great with privacy and…new information. So then, up to you. Lead me to Erik or shall we spend some time in the bathroom? Keep in mind that a threesome is _always_ an option. I think you'd be a fun addition. Erik would agree, surely."

An ultimatum. Charles…honestly had no idea what to do. Charles had yelled earlier and Professor Odin hadn't woken up. Charles walked out, well aware that Loki was following, and closely at that. Occasionally Loki's hand would slip behind Charles's messenger bag into his back pocket and Charles would sort of spasm until he backed away. He couldn't go to Erik, but maybe he could go to…Charles turned the corner, hoping to see Tony or Steve but he passed both their doors and found them with the lights off and locked. Loki smiled. "You thought I didn't know about them. You really are adorable." Loki grabbed Charles's cheek and Charles slapped the hand away. Loki smiled dangerously. "I love hate sex. Too bad there's cameras in the hall or I'd take you right here."

Why wasn't anyone around? What kind of luck did Charles have today? Loki had grabbed Charles backpack and stealthily pushed his lower back to lead him to the bathroom. Charles never learned self-defense, even if he had, he didn't have the strength for it to be effective. He was out of options at this point. "Don't…just. You can kiss me but please don't."

Loki smiled. "No, none of that. Lucky for you I do think rape is too far. Plus it's not as much fun. Though I've never had a problem with people wanting more. We'll see how it ends up." Charles walked into the bathroom reluctantly, feverously glancing around for _someone_ to show up. Then the least expected happened. Loki stopped upon their entering the background and smiled. "Now we wait."

His smile was even more demonic than it had been. "Wait for wh-"

"Sh, sh." Loki put his finger to Charles's lips. "Listen."

There was a loud jangling of door knobs being tried and found locked. Loki gestured toward one of the stalls. "Go in there. It'll be fun, I promise." Charles didn't move. Loki's mischievous expression vanished and for a moment Charles could've sworn his eyes turned red. "_Go!_"

Charles ran off, feeling like an idiot for not standing up for himself. But really, being behind a locked door from this man looked like the better option. Charles heard the footsteps enter the bathroom and skid to a halt. He barely had time to wonder who it was when he heard the sound of kissing.

Loki had won. He'd found bait. He hadn't expected to find bait. Really, Erik get over _him_? It was absurd. But regardless, he had his lips back on his and Erik wasn't pulling away. Oh he'd trained him well. Loki grinded their hips together and pressed his finger nail down the back of Erik's neck painfully, the way he liked it.

Erik's breath was fast. It was a familiar experience, being led to hatred and fear and then met with Loki's pure lust. Loki basically _had_ trained him for it. It was so practiced. They'd been together for so long. So familiar, but never the same. It was different every time. And that was really why they'd stayed together all that time, curiosity.

Charles had easily recognized Erik's gasp. But what was new was the moaning. The sounds of want. The short cry of pain followed by more kissing. Charles couldn't move. He could stay here and listen to it all, or go out and _see_ it. He didn't know which was worse. Seeing it would also stop it, but was it worth the image forever burned into his mind?

The kissing stopped and Charles heard Erik's heavy breathing continue as Loki announced, "I almost forgot. I brought you a surprise." Charles knew what he was getting at. Every limb was weak, broken, betrayed. He pushed the lock open.

Erik's heart exploded into pain, guilt, failure. Loki had an air of magic about him, could put a trance on Erik in a matter of moments. So dangerous in public. He really hadn't thought it would work now that he had Charles. But here he was, panting with Loki's name on his lips. Watching as Charles pushed the bathroom stall open, tears again pouring from his eyes. His earlier words echoed through Erik's mind. '_Your fault_.' And this time, Erik couldn't disagree.


	8. The Show Must Go On

"Charles, wait!" Loki let them leave, knowing already how the conversation would end. Loki doesn't play games, he creates them. This was a game he'd already won and he knew how it ended.

Charles walked as fast as he could down the hall, Erik chasing after him and Loki hidden, but listening. "Erik, this…tonight was supposed, but how the _hell_ am I _ever_ supposed to trust you?"

The sentence ended with a sob and Erik knew that stupid snot was running down his face and that Charles, ever concerned about pride, wouldn't turn to face him now. "Charles…it's like you and Moira-"

Charles scoffed. "_Like me and Moira._ Are you grasping at _straws?_ Moira and I are _friends_. We're exes, yes, but we're _nothing_ like whatever the hell you two are. What, do you tell people you broke up and then lure in a kid like me to spice up the sex? Is that all I am? Because I heard you cry in pain. You liked it, Erik. He gives you what you want. So what am I? I'm nothing. I'm prey. You told me today about…and you said you _didn't tell anyone else_." Charles actually turned to look at Erik. "Oh but you didn't have to tell him did you. He _knew_."

Erik's blood boiled, at Charles's careless words and Loki's actions that caused this. Right now Charles was more important. And Charles would always be more important. "_Please_." Erik begged. "Charles, I don't want him. You…please let me explain. We were young and we were each the only other person we knew who was openly gay. You said you had a bond you couldn't explain with Moira, that's what-"

"Fuck you." Charles could barely breathe passed his sobs. "Stop. St- Stop bringing Moira into this. If I'd just stayed with h-her, _none of this_. None." He coughed a bit. "Would have happened. It's all just lies. I'm probably not even gay at all. I bet you forced that onto me. You were the one so concerned about me liking Emma."

Erik was quiet for a moment and they both looked at each other. Charles would barely let him speak and it was never long enough to explain. Erik hated himself for even thinking it, he would hate himself for saying it, but it would fix this. It would either fix this or destroy it forever. Maybe Erik didn't get on stage, but right now he needed to be an actor. He remembered what Tony did for Steve, with Peggy. A veil of rage covered Erik's face, inside his heart was shattered and he was now stepping on the pieces. "Perfect! Yeah, you go fucking get Emma. You find Emma after the show tonight, if you can even _perform_ the show tonight with how messed up you are right now. You get with Emma tonight. Fuck her. If you like it, congrats. If you don't then I've answered your question."

Charles hesitated for a moment and Erik worried he saw the truth of Erik's panic and anticipated jealousy, but Charles must've seen something he didn't like. Erik wouldn't know that that was the moment Loki chose to step into the hall and make himself visible to Charles. The anger and pain returned to Charles's expression. His words were articulated and hard hitting. "_**The show must go on**_."

Charles walked away and everything Erik expected from the day, from the week, from everything, vanished in the span of five minutes.

Erik stood in the hall, watching Charles go. It was silent. He didn't hear Loki walk up behind him. "So your boy is British. That's cool. We should've tried accents."

Erik could've punched Loki, he equally could've pressed him against a wall. Their relationship was the most messed up thing he'd ever seen. "We did. But you said my German accent was fucked up for someone who is supposed to be German."

Loki nodded, remembering. "Yeah, that's right. What was mine? You wanted it so bad when I did that accent."

Erik's eyes went dark. "British. Now explain to me how the hell I don't hate you right now."

Loki smiled and slung an arm around Erik's shoulders. "You can never hate me. I trained you too well."

Erik pushed his arm off. "Fuck you."

"Mmm, please and thank you." A few weeks ago, Erik would've laughed. "Shit, you're serious about this one. Before you move to like Alaska to protect him and get away from me can we have one more night for old time's sake? The kid's lucky to have you. You really are quite good."

Erik began to walk across campus to the parking lot. He sighed quietly but it came out as that growl that Charles had previously been fond of. "He will _never_ be lucky to have me. I was the lucky one. But you probably fucked all that up now. No surprise there."

Loki shrugged. "I dunno. The kid was fond of you. Even back talked me when I tried to make you sound bad. I think you'll get him back. But if he is bi and not gay, then he just might fuck this girl anyway. Bad call on your part. Assuming it bothers you. I, obviously, was never one to care for such things."

Erik pushed Loki away again. "Bullshit. I even lay eyes on a girl and you took it out on me that night."

Loki shook his head. "You say that, but I could never really punish you. You like it too much."

"You realize we're in a school still."

Loki looked around. "So we are. My place then?"

Erik narrowed his eyes at him. "What the fuck, did you listen to anything I said?"

Loki waved his hand back and forth, motioning that he'd kind of listened. "I heard us reminiscing about great sex and really what better way to ignore a cheating partner than to cheat."

Erik was frightened to find himself considering it. Having Loki back around was like returning to who he was all those years ago. Erik and Loki were as bad as each other. They'd started dating Erik's freshman year, Loki's sophomore year. Kept it going until this summer. Erik could remember how much he cared for Loki, how Erik would protect him from Steve, Tony, Peggy, Pepper, all of them. They said such horrible things about Loki and Erik would say just as horrible things right back about them. It really was a surprise he'd been staying at Steve and Tony's school so long and hadn't gotten expelled. So it had been a sort of lie when Erik told Charles that the other drama kids didn't look at him funny. They didn't because Erik had a reputation, as stereotypically 'high school' as it sounded and equally as untrue as in the movies. Erik was a good guy, even played well with others. Others meaning people who were also gay or bi. He was prejudiced. Thought it was he and Loki against the world. That no one else could possibly understand.

The problem came about that Loki didn't care as much. He did care actually, which came as a surprise to everyone including Loki himself. He was as fond of Erik as a boy with that cold of a heart could be. And maybe that one time Erik asked Loki to try to be intimate without all the insane stuff, maybe Loki liked it more than he expected.

"Loki, you know I can't."

Loki actually had the nerve to get into the passenger seat as Erik sat in his car. "Maybe we didn't always have the easiest times and maybe most of our relationship…okay basically all the relationship was sex, but we had our strong points. And if _I'm_ still getting over it, your heart is probably still broken. Just as a goodbye. I won't even take my briefs off."

Erik scoffed. "Like you ever wear underwear."

Loki smirked. "Exactly."

Erik sighed. All he had to do was drive home. But was it right? It wasn't like he'd asked Charles out yet. They technically weren't together. Though Erik had mentioned the boyfriend word to Charles, and he hadn't denied it…

"Loki…get out of my car." The world spun. Get _out_ of the car? Loki sat and stared. When could Erik _ever_ resist him? Was this truly the end? Erik and the kid would spend their lives together just like Steve and Tony? Loki found the whole domestic bliss thing a bit nauseating. When Erik leaned over, Loki prepared a remark about a goodbye kiss, but Erik's hand just pulled on the door handle and pushed it open. "Out. Now."

The next thing he remembered was the engine turning on and watching the car disappear around the turn. It had always been him and Erik. Erik had changed. Loki hadn't. Now that Erik had someone new, what did that mean for Loki?

The boy was quiet for a long time after that. A few days even. Enough so that Odin actually left him home alone. He sat in his room and stared at old pictures, a sketch Erik had given him of the two of them, drawn as characters in that stupid video game he was obsessed with creating.

'_Loki and Magneto, when the world goes bad, they'll see us as good.'_

If Loki was going to be good, then Erik would be a god. Maybe Loki could be a god too. One of the bad ones, fighting against the world. Only this time, the fantasy had one main character and two antagonists. _No_, Loki corrected himself. Two _pro_tagonists who would keep the world together against a man who would see it ripped apart. Loki thought he and Erik fit perfectly together, but maybe they were too similar. Opposites attract and now Erik was done fighting to stay by Loki's side. Maybe Loki was done fighting too.

-x-

The show went by in a blur; a blur of pain when he knew it was Erik lifting him in the air, a blur of guilt when he knew it was Moira shinning Tinkerbelle at him, and a blur of curiosity when Emma spoke her lines about the kiss. He'd talked to Emma before the show and the conversation had been…odd to say the least.

"_Emma! What are you doing tonight?" Charles's mind was numb, only thinking that he had to go through with this to get back at Erik. Though it wasn't the greatest plan seeing as Erik didn't care so jealousy wasn't an apt rebuttal. It seemed like a good method of revenge at the time._

_Emma immediately went into flirt mode. "Not sure yet. Did you have something in mind?" _

_She actually squeezed her boobs together with her arms to get her message across. Charles didn't laugh though, of course he didn't. "Emma…" His hand rested on her face and the tenderness seemed to shock her. "You're a wonderful girl and you don't need to lower yourself to such techniques to win me over. Now I did have something in mind and if you'll allow it, I'll speak to you about it after the show."_

_Her light blue eyes stayed focused on Charles's and her expression was almost guarded, but not antagonistic. She nodded. Charles kissed her on the cheek and went to his dressing room to get ready._

Even though he'd only ever been with Moira, Charles knew his way around flirting. He stood by Emma's closed door as she changed and waited for the door to open. He held a rose he'd managed to dash out and grab from the foyer. They only had the white roses left, but that didn't seem like a tragedy, Charles couldn't place why. He stared down at the flower and traced his thumb around the smooth yet somehow sharp lines of it. Roses were so sure of themselves. So perfectly shaped and strong, yet you peel off just one petal and suddenly the perfection is lost. So you keep pulling away petals to try to fix it and then- it's over. Erik had pulled off that first petal and it was all Charles could do to not rip off the rest.

He heard the coat rack swaying as Emma picked up her coat behind the door. He brushed his thoughts under a mat and faced the door with a smirk that didn't touch his eyes.

-x-

Erik was up on the lights readjusting some positions as the rigging had run into them and knocked them from their intended positions. He glanced down for a moment and saw Charles holding that single white rose, caressing it softly. Then Emma walked out and Charles slipped an arm around her waist and they walked to his car. Erik couldn't hear them and god did he want to know if Charles had dropped his accent. That would give him the answer, but for the moment all he could do was listen to the crunch of footsteps falling on the broken glass he now referred to as his heart. Every step of that stiletto heel turned the pieces into dust and after a few moments, Erik was numb. At least, he expected himself to be numb. To be used to this kind of pain.

This was something new and it exercised a part of Erik's heart he didn't know existed. His turtleneck seemed to tighten around his throat and when Erik's feet hit the floor of the stage after climbing back down from the lights, he wasn't surprised to feel Loki's thin hands slip around his neck.

"Erik, please let me come over."

Erik didn't say a word, but he allowed Loki to shadow him around the stage as he set up for tomorrow's performance. Then he left and drove home with Loki's hand over his on the steering wheel.


	9. How Long Must This Go On

((I'm currently worried about how I will be able to write Emma, so I would appreciate it if you let me know how I did after you read this chapter. I will do my utmost to fix it if it sucks, but here's hoping I get lucky and it's fine.))

Charles texted Raven to let her know he couldn't get her a ride. The fact that nothing had changed was the first thing that stabbed him in the gut. He planned to tell her everything. To tell everyone everything. Everyone should know about him and Raven by now, but Charles was putting it off because god forbid he complicate his night with Emma. Such a simple matter, this fucking ridiculous- but he was going through with it. He was.

Emma got in the car a little before Charles and was able to glance around for a moment. Charles sat and she sort of smirked at him. "Cute."

Charles's eyebrows were drawn together in an amused smirk. "If that's your way of asking if I'm gay and having you over for brownies and a sleepover, you better change your mindset."

Emma leaned back in the chair and sort of hollered. "Attractive, talented, _and_ into me. And they told me it couldn't happen." She look at him through her eyelashes. "So what did you have in mind?"

Despite the situation and the fact that his heart could barely feel any of the laughter he was feigning, he never could resist lame attempts at humor. "I'll tell you in the morning."

After having melted the ice, and literally he had. Emma Frost was stone cold, to everyone. Yet here she was singing along to his radio, for god's sake. And he had to admit, it was endearing to see her outside the school. When they were nearly there, Charles turned down the radio, keeping in mind Moira's first reaction. "I should warn you, um…"

Emma seemed to turn back to ice. "Oh god, you have an STD don't you. I knew it was too good to be true."

Charles actually sputtered out a laugh. "Um, no. No that's not, what I was going to say at all." Emma breathed out a whole hearted 'thank god' as Charles turned toward the house. "No, I was going to say that my house is sort of…large."

Charles's headlights swooped into the drive way and lit up part of the mansion. Emma's jaw dropped and Charles recollected his entrance to Erik's house. Supposedly he wouldn't be surprised by the wealth of it, but really, the technology was just astounding!

Charles coughed as a sob built back up in his throat. No, he couldn't think about that. He and Emma had gotten out of the car so he walked over to take her hand. "So should I give you the tour or should I give you the _tour_?"

She giggled as Charles slipped his arm around her waist and her head fell on his shoulder. "Maybe both?"

Charles kissed her temple. "As you wish."

The game was even now. Charles had brought someone else home. Two against two.

No. Charles couldn't count himself. So he was winning, yes. Two against Erik's one. Winning, yes of course. This was winning. This was what victory felt like. Right.

-x-

Loki had recognized what Erik was saying with his silence. Maybe Loki was arrogant, but he wasn't stupid. Regardless of winning, he had lost. He could see that.

They got out of the car and Loki followed, waiting on Erik to break the silence. He cautiously touched Erik's hand as they walked and found Erik didn't protest so he grabbed his hand firmly. Erik's tense shoulders slouched and for the first time in his life, Loki watched Erik Lehnsherr break.

He'd seen Erik cry. When their ideas of what might be fun ended up more painful than expected, but he'd never seen him cry without the influence of physical pain and something about that made Erik hard to look at. Maybe it was the shame he knew Erik was feeling, because of the weakness that he always hated to show. Once they got to Erik's room, Erik scooted into the corner his bed was settled next to. It was a twin sized bed so Erik and Loki had usually found themselves on the floor. Today, Erik pulled his knees to his chest, brought his arms around, and stared at his feet from between his knees.

Loki settled himself next to Erik and let his left hand tangle in the soft tufts of hair above Erik's neck. His right hand landed on top of Erik's. Loki kissed the sensitive spot on Erik's knee and then rested his head on Erik's shoulder.

It was silent for a long time.

_((Short chapter, sorry. But I figured I needed something more than that last one.))_


	10. Roxanne

Loki knew what a friend would say at this point. He knew which words would be a comfort. He knew what to say to make Erik calm down. But another thing about Loki, he didn't lie to Erik.

"She's probably all over him right now." Erik shoved Loki off of him and Loki felt a sad smile slip onto his lips as he bounced after impact. "Erik, you gave him the choice. He took it. He's going through with it but that doesn't mean he won't still choose you."

Erik would've shaken his head if his body weren't so rigid. "If he's going through with it, then he's chosen."

Loki folded his arms behind his head and looked up at Erik. "You don't know that he has yet."

-x-

"Oh my _god_, Charles!" Emma's voice was hardly fragile and Charles worried that his dad would hear regardless that he was on the opposite side of the mansion. "Do you seriously have a whole _wing_ to yourself?"

Charles shrugged as he and Emma continued walking around the area Charles had long ago claimed as his own. "Pick a room."

Emma flitted around looking inside the doors. She was exactly the opposite from what he expected. Charles allowed himself to zone out as he waited for her choice. He'd been stuffing all thoughts of Erik behind a door in his mind and now that door was bursting open. The thoughts of Erik, Steve, Tony and now that bastard ex-boyfriend all knowing about Charles being…well he wasn't. That was just Er- but Moira had said so…and he could at least trust Moira. He certainly couldn't trust himself. And that's why Emma was…it was then that it hit him. Why Erik said what he did. Why he told Charles to go after Emma. What Tony said to Steve about Ms. Carter. That would mean that Erik actually did ca-

No. No, Charles is just over evaluating. He just had to listen to Erik practically moan Loki's name within a moment of seeing him. No.

A noise pierced his ears and he blinked. Emma's hand was in front of his face snapping. "Hello, Charles? Are you alright?"

Charles just stared for a moment as the door had burst open and he had to shove everything back in. The mental door clicked shut and Charles, in a practiced motion, smoothly brushed the tear from his cheek in a way that had Emma wondering if it were ever there. "Yes, of course. You picked then?"

She hesitated as she continued to stare directly into Charles's eyes. Her voice descended a few pitches from where it had been and her light and ditzy attitude faded in a heartbeat. "Look, Charles. You know I'm not usually like this and I'm sorry I…did that. I just figured since you were into Moira, you liked the more…enthusiastic girls. Not me and my sarcasm and bitterness. If it's making things weird I can ju-"

Charles's moved one had to the back of her neck and the other slipped around to the small of her waist. He captured her lips with a hollow desperation. He just needed her to stop describing Erik. "You're fine. You're pe-perfect."

She would've normally heard the lie in that, but the compliment of 'perfect' blinded her. "Perfect?" She stared at him with her mouth open slightly, eyebrows together in confusion, head tilted to the side.

Charles closed his eyes and kissed her jaw. His voice was a whisper that tickled her ear. "Which room?"

-x-

Images flew behind Erik's eyelids. Images that carried knives. Poisoned knifes that each held their own deadly liquid. A flash of Loki's lips left a cut of lust and self-hatred. Emma's perfect make up, another cut, this time with jealousy and rage. Charles's soft brown hair before it was dyed, stabbed his hand where the memory of touch had remained, leaving a sting of _too late_. Charles's bright red lips and how they felt on Erik's, a wound to his stomach leaving him wanting to cough up the blood of the wound of…no it was too soon for that. So soon... Charles's bright blue eyes were now a pool of never ending shame for Erik to look into. A pool in which Erik now longed to drown because it will now and forever be too late.

When Loki's touch dared to return to his skin, the contact seared a burn onto his arm and Erik teeth mashed together animalistically. A touch that used to be an icy comfort was now a hot flame branding his skin each time Erik crossed Charles. Loki would never touch him again, that much was certain. Loki was speaking, but words were beyond Erik right now. The images continued to flash in front of his eyes and each time Charles's lips flitted by, the wound in his stomach felt more and more real. Erik coughed and found blood in his hand, unsure of whether it was an illusion or if Loki was putting him out of his misery.

The war in his eyes waged on far into the night. Loki sat on the very edge of the bed. Erik didn't even notice when he left.

-x-

Loki had watched the entire time. Watched as Erik's teeth clamped down on either his tongue or the inside of his cheek. He'd started bleeding, but wouldn't allow Loki to help. If Erik cried, the tears evaporated before they could fall. Erik was a tense, burning coil of pure rage and even Loki's touch, which Erik previously described as soothing ice, seemed to burn him. Loki stood by the door, ready to walk home. A familiar walk, but he knew this would be his last journey down it. He thought for a moment that Erik's outburst had somehow left a drop of saliva on his cheek, but as Loki brushed his cheek bone, he found something much more foreign to him.

Loki could not remember the last time he'd shed a tear.

-x-

Charles was panting on his bed. Emma had long since been gone, but Charles hadn't bothered putting his shirt back on yet. He hadn't even had the decency to walk her out. The poor girl probably got lost.

He fought back the urge. He couldn't. He really should not. He really, really, _really_ should not even be _considering_ the thoughts in his head right now. His body moved without his mind's consent and the action was done before Charles could run through the list of cons.

He thoroughly expected to see Loki on the other side of Erik's door. All the resolve Charles had built up to come here and face Erik shattered to pieces upon seeing him. It was late, maybe almost…oh 10. So not that late. When Erik caught sight of Charles, his tremors stopped. He moved as if in a daze, his eyes were locked somewhere over Charles's shoulder, but Charles knew Erik was still looking at him. Whenever his eyes moved, they seemed to float over any direct contact with Charles. Erik sat on the edge of his bed after sliding ever so slowly out of his coil. Then Erik's eyes began to focus on the fact that yes, Charles was indeed actually here. It took all of a single second for Erik's eyes to see Charles's mused hair before he snapped like a wire and shot back into the corner.

"I don't want to hear a victory speech." Erik's voice was cold and distant, but burned with a thousand emotions.

Charles quickly brushed through his hair as he cursed at himself for not checking the mirror. "No! No…Eri- Erik it. It didn't. We. She."

Charles found Erik's eyes locked on his. He saw everything in that moment, just a moment. The only amount of time that Erik could stand to see those blue pools again. Erik held the gaze just long enough to slowly emphasize the words. "Fuck. You." Then the contact broke and Charles could just stare.

Charles spoke in one puff of breath. "Eriksheleft."

Still, the coil grew ever tighter, but Erik somehow managed to shrug. "Find another _dame_. Maybe you can get a _princess_ or more likely you'll just date a long line of _bitches_."

Charles snapped. "GODDAMMIT, ERIK. I SENT HER AWAY. I COULDN'T DO IT."

Charles's fist curled up, waiting at any moment for Loki to pop out of a closet and gloat. Waiting and ready to fight back when the two of them would try to drag him into bed. Poised and ready to fight.

Not ready for Erik's resolve to melt. Not ready for a hoarse voice that carried so much disbelief and…no it couldn't be. It was too soon for that. "Prove it." The words were desperate. Ready to hear the answer, but not ready to be vulnerable enough to believe. Needing to believe. Needing more than anything.

Charles dug through his mind for some sort of proof he could offer up. His lips had met Emma's and her lipstick most likely still lingered. He'd pressed close to her so their cologne and perfume had mixed. What physical proof could he possibly offer up? Unless…Erik didn't mean _physical_ proof…

Charles stared right back into Erik's unwavering, waiting gaze. "I need _you._"

Erik's head twitched as he nervously shook his head. Charles could practically hear his heart beating. "No, it's more than that."

Charles bit his lip and his eyebrows came together. Worried. His voice came out softer and more scared than he intended, the terror of the moment showing through easily. "If you're so sure, then you say it."

Charles could only watch as Erik stood, strength flooding back into him as he righted himself. He took slow, wondering steps toward Charles. Charles found himself stepping forward as well.

Erik's hand rose ever so delicately, hesitating before coming to rest on the side of Charles's face. Charles's breath hitched as his eyes fluttered closed and then open again."

Erik opened his mouth and they both knew the words about to be spoken. They knew but they still floated in nonexistence until one of them would drag them through to become real. Erik's other hand brushed his fingers down Charles's spine and Charles desperately wrapped his arms around Erik's waist. Foreheads together, eyes closed, mouths so close but not yet touching. Erik took a deep breath and pulled their faced apart to look into Charles's eyes.

The world fell silent. Not a single grasshopper chirped. Not a single gush of wind floated by. Not a single scamper. Not a single breath.

"Charles…" Erik's voice was already coated in the words he knew were about to be spoken. "I love you."


	11. Keep Holding On

Charles's lips were on Erik's in a flash. All of the past forgotten and only the present and future mattered for now. He just needed this…this wonderful glorious brilliant and somehow perfect for him man. Charles's breath hitched when he pressed their hips together and their pace slowed significantly. This caused Charles's eyes to reopen and stare with wonder into Erik's. The way Erik knew what Charles needed, what he was feeling, how to make him most comfortable without rushing anything…it was just other worldly.

Erik brought their lips together again to bite Charles's lip. "You going to leave me hanging then?"

The words were on an endless repeat in Charles's head. _I love you I love you, god, Erik I love you._ But they didn't make their way to his voice. "M…me too. L-lo…Erik…I need to…"

Erik stepped back and let his arms fall to grab Charles's hands and pulled him to sit on the bed. "I should explain about Loki first."

Charles shook his head. "But my si- and Emma."

Erik brushed his hand through Charles's hair, guilt thick in his eyes. "You need to learn to finish your words when you speak. While you do that, I'll speak first." He paused for a moment and somehow the guilt grew in him. "I'm sure you realized the kind of relationship Loki and I had. I wish I could say it was shallow, but it was…complicated. We cared for each other, but not _even close _to what we have now. With me and you. It was very pain oriented and once we'd run out of ideas of physical pain, which trust me that took a damn long time, Loki started experimenting with emotional pain. It wasn't a hard thing to come by in me. It happened enough that…wait I know the word that you would get. We talked about it freshman year in Bio. Um… the dog and the bell and the drooling…"

Charles's voice was soft and scared as he listened, not wanting to hear but needing to know. "Pavlov."

Erik's eyes widened as he smiled. "Yes! Pavlov!" He glanced at Charles's eyes and the smile faded. "Well anyway, that's the kind of thing that happened with me and Loki and pain. So when you weren't at the parking lot. And you said your class was with Odin…I jumped to the unreasonable, but somehow accurate, assumption that Loki had found you. I panicked. I could only image the things he would say to you, or worse, what he might do to you. The fear, the guilt, the…the agony, Charles. It was all things he'd put me through before. And when he pulled me in for the kiss…I forgot everything. I was a junior again. A junior who hadn't met you. Everything disappeared because…because… Because that's just the insanity you get when you have a relationship with Loki! I was so sure you'd win over. I didn't think he could make me forget you…"

Erik's voice faded away and Charles thought now that the anger and pain where gone, maybe what was left was…fear. Charles wanted to be spiteful and strong. He'd been wronged. He earned the right to be mad at Erik. But he found himself petting the back of Erik's neck. "Sh. It's fine. I'm not very memorable."

Erik glared at him. "Bullshit." Charles's eyes widened at the implications of what Erik might mean. "You are the most memorable person I've ever met." It was quiet as the teens seemed to reconsider what they were to each other. "Personality aside, how could anyone forget your hair." Erik managed a smirk and ruffled Charles's hair.

Charles frowned and batted his hand away. "It's just a dye. It'll be gone soon enough." Erik laughed and moved to lie down. He patted the small space between himself and the edge for Charles to join him. Charles curled into Erik's side and let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. "It's strange how much this does for me."

Erik's eyebrow lifted. "Getting off on cuddling?" His hand moved to check if Charles had an erection, but the hand was swatted away with an air of panic that left Charles nearly falling off the bed.

"God, Erik! No! I meant that it calms me down. Just laying with you." They stared at each other, face to face. Comfortable silences reigned over their evening.

Erik draped his arm over Charles. "So…about Emma…"

Charles frowned. "You did that cause of Tony and Steve, didn't you?" Erik nodded without interrupting and Charles sighed. "Should've known."

Erik scoffed. "Clearly you did if you're bringing it up."

Charles opened his mouth to argue, but then stopped, conceding Erik's point. "Well she came over."

"Came over what? Your couch?" Erik's still somehow kept a smirk on his face, though he was nervous that he could possibly be correct.

Charles rolled his eyes. "Honestly. Everything is dirty to you. No, she…was a guest at my house. For about 10 minutes. Maybe less. No okay it was about 15 minutes. Regardless, it didn't last long. We walked inside and she was…choosing…never mind that part isn't important. But she was acting giddy for most of the night and she stopped and explained she was acting because she thought it would make me like her more. She started to describe how she was actually bitter, sarcastic and some other things and well I kissed her to make her stop talking because…" Erik's face was slowly fading from playful into emotionless. Charles tried to hurry up the story. "Because she was describing you. And she said the things as if they were repulsive and in all honesty, I may have just as well been repulsed had it taken place a few months ago. But in her words, all I could see was you… The kiss was…well she tangled her hands in my hair a lot. Good _lord_ the woman likes hair. She managed to pull me into a room and drag my shirt off before I could mumble a no. Nothing happened on my side apart from clumsy tripping and being dragged. She tried to move my hands onto her ass, but I pushed her away." Charles cursed as Erik's eyes grew ever darker. Maybe Charles enjoyed story telling too much, but Erik didn't seem to be fond of the details. Charles mentally slapped himself and tried to be more blunt. "So she left. And I stared at the ceiling for a while. Then before I knew it, I was at your door. I don't even remember putting my shirt on. Hence the hair. I hadn't checked the mirror. Sorry for that."

Erik seemed to cool down at the fact that Charles's pants had never come off. "How did you get to my door? Like you were at the door to my room. Not even the front door."

Charles stared at the door. "I…I'm really not sur-"

"Sorry, sir." A British voice chimed above them. "He seemed earnest."

Erik threw a pillow at the speaker. "Jarvis, don't eaves drop." After another apology, Jarvis fell silent and Erik was still tense with the question he really needed answered. "So…you didn't really try too hard. To get her… I mean. You didn't have to… Did you." Erik wasn't sure he wanted to know. Regardless of his nervous entrance, Charles had dropped his accent the entire time he was with Erik. In fact, Erik couldn't really remember Charles's American accent at the moment. "Your accent…" he said finally.

"Oh!" Charles shook his head and scooted closer to Erik. "No, she doesn't know." Erik mashed his lips onto Charles's. Charles smiled. "It seems to mean as much to you as it does to me. Lucky me, found someone who understands."

Erik's gaze grew very tender, but still serious. "So about what I said earlier…"

Charles pressed his arm under where Erik was laying and hugged him tightly. He brought his mouth to Erik's ear, "I love you, Erik." The words echoed through him, leaving a trail like a burning flame.

It was quiet again for a while after another session of 'snogging' as Charles had called it and Erik snorted in his face. While they were silent, they observed each other and Erik sighed. "You're thinking too much. What is it?"

Charles bit his lip. "I just…I'd really like to stay…but there was something I was going to do and I got…distracted."

Erik sat up and stretched. "I swear to god if you're leaving me for homework I will burn your textbooks."

Charles blinked in horror for a moment, then dismissed the threat as a joke. "No, much more serious than homework. Family stuff." Charles's heart soared at the thought that people would know about him and Raven soon.

Charles meant to leave then, really he did. But the idea that he could kiss Erik again was much more enthralling than driving home. Charles had the misfortune of being a drunk tired person. No, not a tired drunk. He just…when it got to a certain time of night, you'd swear he'd been drinking. After a particularly sloppy kiss, Erik pushed Charles away and wiped the slobber off his mouth with the back of his sleeve. "What the hell was that?"

Charles blinked his drooping eyelids. "Hm? I…your tongue is weird."

Erik coughed. "Okay…who taught you to kiss? Or do you suck everyone's tongue into your mouth and hold it there with your teeth?"

Charles shrugged and leaned into Erik. "Dunno. Seemed like a good idea at the time."

Erik's eyebrows came together as he took a deep breath. "Have you been drinking or something?"

A giggle burst from Charles's lips. "Ohhhh. No. It's a thing with the tired. Certain tiredness..." He never finished his sentence.

Erik looked concerned. "Do you need me to drive you home?"

Charles tried to say no. He really did. But when a wave of tiredness swept over him and he nearly fell over, he didn't make a convincing argument. The thought of his car spending the night at Erik's made him convulse with giggles on the ride home. Erik really had no idea what was wrong with Charles, though he couldn't help but find it endearing.

As they got closer to the house, Charles quickly became 'sober.' Charles twitched in his seat. "Erik, you should just drop me here. I'll walk the rest of the way."

He adjusted the radio quieter now that Charles seemed done babbling and scoffed at him. "We're in the middle of nowhere. I'm not letting you walk for…probably another mile. I mean look over there. We're by some sort of castle. You probably have a long walk ahead of you."

Charles stared at his feet. "…just down the drive way."

Erik stopped the car. "You live in the castle? But…Tony talks about this place all the time. I thought he said it was some historical site or something?" Memories Erik hadn't remembered in years flew back. A book…a picture book from the tourists that took him in. The picture looked just like this. He remembered the man pointing to the picture…but he couldn't remember the story that went with it.

Charles licked his lips. "Yes…well I live in a castle then."

Erik shook off the memories and frowned at Charles. "Sorry. Didn't know you were touchy about your hardship."

Erik hadn't meant to be bitter. He really didn't. Charles's mouth gaped. "Well excuse me. Didn't realize there was such a difference between it and the robot's stomach you live in."

"…robot's stomach?" The bitterness of a foster child came and left in an instant. Something about Charles just…tamed him.

Charles's glare softened, but he tried to keep up appearances. "How else do you describe that house?"

Erik sighed and put the car in park. "Should I come in or…?"

Charles glanced at the house with a calm determination flooding through him. "No. Well…not yet. I just need to…I'll come get you in a few minutes. If…if everything goes alright. If not I guess I'll just text you and. No, I'll come back out. Just give me a few minutes."

Erik nodded but still pulled Charles in for a kiss. The edge of his mouth twitched happily in a smug grin.

Erik watched Charles walk inside, already so much different from when they first met. He walked with a spring in his step now, an air of confidence left in his wake; the walk of a man who could conquer the world, the walk of a hero… again Erik's thoughts led him to want to use Charles as his video game's protagonist.

Erik turned off the engine, adjusted his chair, and began to brainstorm.

-x-

Raven stared out the window and saw the headlights swoop into the driveway. She assumed they were Charles's and didn't think to take a closer look. She heard him quickly greet their father and then the oh-so-stealthy and graceful ascent of the stairs to her room. She waited for the footsteps to reach the door and turned the knob just before Charles was about to knock.

"_Jesus CHRIST!_" Charles jumped away from the door as his heart started beating even faster than it was with just nerves going through him.

Raven gloated at him and used a baby voice to say "Oh poor baby! Did I scare you?"

Charles stood up straight from where he was hyperventilating. "Fuck you, Raven." They stared at each other in silent companionship and Charles caught his breath. "I need to talk to you." He strolled into her room.

She closed the door behind him. "To what do I owe this gracious honor?"

Charles smirked. "You mean 'to whom' but we'll get to that later."

Raven quickly grabbed his hands and started jumping up and down. "Oh my god, you're going to tell me about the girl. So it isn't Emma? Oh THANK GOD. Tell me tellmetellme."

Charles's smile flickered away for a moment as his resolve faltered. Charles's tongue nervously ran across his lips. He sighed. "Come sit, Raven." They sat on the floor. Raven was silent, knowing how her brother could sometimes take hours to get the words right in his head before he spoke. After longer than Raven could stand, Charles finally began to speak. "It's time for this to stop. You told me yourself that hiding doesn't help you. It seems the façade has been kept up for my benefit alone and is hurting you more than helping. Starting tomorrow, I want everyone to know we're related."

Raven's jaw dropped open and she threw her arms around Charles and tackled him to the floor with a somehow elegant screech of joy. "Oh my god, Charles!" She squeezed him tightly. "Make sure you tell Azazel first, cause he's still convinced we're into each other."

Charles looked at her with disgust. "Seriously? He still thinks that after all these years? We've barely talked in front of him."

She rolled her eyes. "That's the main reason he thinks it's there. He thinks that we're both lost souls drawn to each other and that's why we have strange moments of eye contact."

Charles sighed. "Well I guess he's not too far off. But yeah, I agree. Set him straight first." Raven giggled in a way that made Charles think he was missing something. "Sorry?"

"Oh." Raven shook her head. "No, it's just funny cause Azazel is gay."

The color paled from Charles's face. "Oh…is that…so." His sister was laughing…because Azazel is…

"Charles…what?" Raven stopped laughing when she saw Charles grow serious.

He bit his lip and stared at her. "You don't have a problem with that, do you?"

Raven blinked. Then they were both still. Then Raven blinked again. "Maybe it's time I-"

"No, Raven. I need to talk first. So if you could just-"

"Charles, I swear it's important if you'd-"

"Please just let me say what I intended to."

"I'm bi." The words came out from the both of them at the same time. They stared at each other for a long moment before Raven started cracking up.

"ARE YOU KIDDING. And I was worried all this time. Wow. So _that's_ what Moira meant…"

Charles's eyes grew wide at the mention of Moira. "What Moira meant? What? What did Moira mean?"

Raven shook her head. "No, I talked to her about telling you. She said she was sure you'd understand. I guess she knew both our hands, huh?"

Raven giggled again. So far…so good. It seemed Charles would be able to introduce Erik. Raven's giggles cut off and her hands fell on Charles's shoulders. "WAIT. You said you were going to tell me about the girl. But now, it doesn't have to be a girl. Oh my god. So much more mysterious. Who is it?"

Charles smiled as fondness warmed his heart. He and Raven had been growing apart and in these few short minutes, they flew back together. Charles stood and beckoned with his head to the window. "Want to meet him?"

Raven took off down the stairs without answering. Charles blinked for a second and then scrambled to follow her. "R-Raven! Raven, jesus! Let me at least introduce you before you smother him!"

When Charles reached the door to the front that Raven had left open, he wasn't sure exactly what he was witnessing.

Erik was standing outside of the car, gaping at Raven and Raven seemed frozen on the steps, staring at Erik.

Charles stepped slowly out of the door and they both seemed to blink. "YOU'RE CHARLES'S SOYSFRIETER?"

It was Charles's turn to blink as they spoke at the same time. "Sorry, one at a time, what?"

Erik was staring at Raven. "_You're_ Charles's sister?"

Raven scoffed. "I could say the same to you. _You're_ Charles's boyfriend?"

Charles's mouth fell open. "Wait, you know each other?"

Raven's hands landed on her hips. She sighed, but there was a certain fondness to it that Charles recognized as friendly bickering. What he didn't expect, was the explanation she gave him.

"Charles, Erik is my ex."


	12. Right Where I Belong

Charles stared between them for a few minutes. He tried to respond maturely but the first question that came to mind was, "Wait, did you guys...kiss?"

Erik stayed silent, watching Charles cautiously, but Raven seemed to be bouncing with excitement and didn't mind telling stories of the past. "Of course. I said he was my ex, not my babysitter. God, Charles."

Erik took a step closer to Charles. It was much like approaching a wild animal. No, this was Charles. It was like approaching a lost puppy. Or a stray cat. Yeah, the cat seemed like the best comparison. As expected, when Erik reached touching distance Charles took a step back. Thoughts were rushing through his mind and he needed to work things out on the inside before he could discuss it. Erik stared at Charles's closed eyes before sighing and turning to Raven. He spoke to her in a whisper, "So…why didn't you tell me you had a brother?"

Raven scoffed, but quieted her voice as well, looking worriedly at her brother and regretting the blunt words. "Um, it's kind of a long story, but…" She smiled up at Erik. "It's a story that is finally over." Raven explained to Erik the adoption situation, knowing Erik of all people would understand being adopted, being different. He listened, but his eyes were trained on Charles the entire time.

When she finished, his hand brushed through his hair. "Fuck, that's why when he saw my room… Fuck, Raven. He knew it was you."

Raven gaped at him. "Wait, _do you still have that ridiculous story board on your walls?_"

Erik shrugged. "What else am I supposed to do with it? It's not done."

Raven looked appalled. "Well first of all, it's not even a story board. It's my rushed horrible drawings just scattered around cause you don't have a plot yet! That is so embarrassing. Who else has seen your room? You can't just display my drawings like that, Erik! Those are horrible."

Erik rolled his eyes and put a hand on her shoulder. "They're gorgeous. Especially for sketches. Raven, your art work is incredible. You need to give yourself more credit." Still, his eyes remained on Charles who hadn't yet moved. Raven's lips pressed together as Erik's hand slid off her shoulder and he moved toward Charles.

Raven grabbed his wrist. "Erik, stop. Don't interrupt him right now."

Erik shook her off. "No, he's done. He twitched when I touched you."

Charles let out a visible sigh. "I had a feeling you were watching me."

Erik brushed his hand through Charles's hair as his eyes opened. "What else is there to look at?"

He smirked and his gaze flickered at a very offended Raven. She balled her fists. "You know what? I'm going inside. You two are both assholes to me and you're perfect for each other. I've actually been meaning to set you up for the last few months but I guess you beat me to it."

She barely closed the door when the two boys were kissing. It was silent between them for a while. Charles opened his mouth to ask about Erik and Raven's past relationship, having mentally repented for calling Raven a bitch, when a window opened.

"Ow, fuck." Something hit Erik and fell to the ground. Raven slammed the window shut and it was quiet again.

Charles reached down to pick up the object and cocked his head. "Why'd she throw this at you?"

Erik's face was red as he shoved the bottle of Vaseline into his jacket pocket. "You have so much to learn, Charles."

-x-

After the longest, most torturous night of her life, Raven shot down the stairs. Raven saw Charles groggily eating breakfast. "Did my present come in handy last night?" Raven's face looked torn between amused and disgusted.

Charles moved to take another bite of his pop tart but missed his mouth. "Not that I know of. Erik put it in his pocket and left."

Raven's jaw dropped. "He just left?"

Charles squinted his eyes. "Well no, I mean we talked some more about me and you. Kissed. Then he left.

Raven's hand fell on her hip. "It was Friday night! Why didn't you ask him to stay?"

Charles looked appalled. "I'm sorry, did you want to hire us as your nightly entertainment? I would assume a sister would not be too fond of her brother's better half coming over at night."

Raven rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, you and Moira were definitely louder than you and Erik would be."

Charles paled. "_And how exactly do you know that_?"

Raven grabbed Charles's second pop tart and walked away with a shrug. Charles moved to get up and start getting ready. He took his time, knowing he had plenty of time until- _It's already noon?_ No, his watch must be wrong. He knew Raven slept late, but she was usually up by 10 and-

A horn honked outside and Raven didn't even turn as she yelled from down the hallway. "I KNOW WHOSE HORN THAT IS."

Charles stood frozen, ignoring Raven and debating whether or not to open the door in his pajamas or go change. For some reason, he felt like Erik might prefer to see him in his pajamas and the thought made him blush. A shadow of a thought crept behind his mind, harshly questioning himself and saying that it wasn't nearly as kinky as Loki, but he shoved the thought away in order to maintain his mental health.

Charles opened the door and blinked into the sunlight. He could see Erik's outline but not yet see the details of his fa-

"Mmph!" Charles startled and fell backwards as Erik dove in for an unexpectedly hot kiss. It left the both of them panting against the wall with the front door still open. "Well, is that how you start your mornings then?"

Erik kissed Charles nose. "Just thinking about how much I wish I'd woken up to that."

A door closed softly, but loud enough for Charles to hear, upstairs. A voice called down, "Charles! What was that noise?"

Charles stared into Erik's eyes, again frozen this time with fear. Charles whispered to Erik, "Go to the car. For god's sake do not make a noise. I thought I'd have more time than this. I slept in."

Erik narrowed his eyes. "It's 12pm. When do you usually wake up?"

Charles tried to decide if Erik were being sarcastic. "If you have similar sleeping habits to Raven, it's a time of morning you've not seen for years." Charles was still and then made a mime of gouging his eyes out. "Oh god, please remind me not to put you, Raven, and sleeping into the same sentence again."

Erik began to walk out the door with a smirk. "Charles, I told you we never slept together."

Charles stared after him with a stupid shocked look on his face. The door closed silently and Charles smiled to himself. "You did tell me that…"

"Tell you what?" Brian Xavier was holding a thermometer and immediately moved to check Charles's temperature.

Charles tried to slap his hands away. "Dad. Dad! What are you doing?"

He managed to land a hand on Charles's forehead. "Hm…you're not warm. You haven't woken up this late since you were 4. You're alright?"

Charles blushed. "Yes, Dad. I'm fine! I…need to talk to you in fact."

Brian nodded and sat at the table, folding his hands. "Ah, it's an ailment of the mind, not the body."

Charles's lips pursed slightly as he sat next to his dad. "You've…always told me you thought I could do anything I ever wanted." Charles allowed the sexual innuendo to get out of his head as fast as it had entered. That one too. Wonderful, trying to come out to his dad and only thinking about sex. Well Erik had just snogged him senseless in his kitchen, maybe he was allowed to be a bit distracted.

Brian sat patiently in Charles's silence. "You seem distracted."

Charles sighed. His dad knew him better than anyone, yet they rarely talked too deeply. Charles liked to assume playing chess with someone allowed you a glimpse into their mind. Charles made eye contact with his father. "Well, you know Moira and I had broken up. Just a mutual agreement that it wasn't working out right."

Brian held the intent gaze in his son's eyes. "Yes. And you've moved on to someone new?"

Charles smiled and let out a shaky laugh. "God, you know me better than I do."

Brian Xavier ruffled his son's hair. "Charles, I think everyone knows you better than you do. You're a very open person and I think that's wonderful."

Again, Charles let out a shaky laugh. "Yes, well I hope that's the case because that would make this conversation much easier." Charles took a deep breath. "Dad I…They're wonderful. So sweet, caring, protective. You'd love them. We could all have a chess tournament, they're amazing. Beat me, twice. I'd like to see who'd be victorious between the two of you. I've already met their parents so it's not fair for them not to meet you and they're actually outside now because I woke up late and I was supposed to talk to you earlier and then I slept in but now you're here and they're here and-"

"Charles, breathe." The run on sentence made less and less sense as it had gone on. Brian waited on his son. He had a feeling he knew where the conversation was going and the pronouns were making it blatantly obvious. "I would love to meet him."

Charles stared at his father as a warmth he hadn't felt in years burned through him. He threw himself into his father's arms, tears streaking down his cheeks. "Dad…"

Brian tightened his arms around Charles for a moment before pushing him away. "Well, what are you waiting for? Go get him!"

Tears were still brimming in Charles's eyes. He grabbed the door knob, then turned. "Oh, Dad! His name is Erik." Charles darted out the door.

-x-

Brian let out a breath he was holding and mentally thanked Raven for bringing such news to him first. Raven was the child that was much more willing to talk, because she didn't see subjects of discussion like this as anything too serious. She just would blurt out something and god help you if you reacted wrong. When Raven had approached him one day and blurted out the word bi, Brian waited for the end of the word. "Bi what, Raven?" It was a term in his vocabulary, but it was usually much more than just a prefix. He expected Raven to end the sentence with bipolar so when she said bisexual, it took a bit of explaining on Raven's part to bring him up to par on the subject. Some animals he studied acted in much the same way, so it was rather easy for him to apply the idea to humans. Relatively. He'd been raised into a boy girl world and this world Raven was introducing to him was a bit of a shock, but for some reason he felt relieved. Maybe he knew his children needed a world like this for them.

Maybe he was just glad of another thing being told to him that Sharon would never hear. She would try to disown Raven for sure. And then blame her for influencing Charles. It would be ugly. It was for the best that she secluded herself to her childhood rooms. Brian missed who she used to be, don't get him wrong. On some lonely days, he came very close to researching exactly what had to be done to get divorce papers. He couldn't bring himself to do it. If their second child had lived on, they'd be in a beautiful flawless relationship still, but the death had wrecked her. And nothing Brian tried could help her. Nothing but her alcohol.

It killed him whenever he looked at her. Her cold eyes, were warmth once lived. Her rigid shoulders that once could be often coaxed into a dance. A bitter voice that was no longer capable of the beautiful songs she used to sing. She was lost. Brian watched the woman he loved die and be replaced with everything Sharon hated about her mother. Sharon vowed to not be like her mother, yet here she was now, the spitting image of her.

Brian found himself staring down the hallway toward her rooms when the door clicked open again, soft voiced floating down the halls. The house brightened at the return of an emotion the rooms had long lost, Brian hadn't even laid eyes on the boy his Charles had chosen, but he could already tell this was much more than a crush. After all, it was always Charles who stayed strong, Charles who took charge, Charles who brought love back into their home.

-x-

Ecstasy was an understatement for the chemicals zipping around Charles's veins. Erik barely got the door open when Charles tackled him almost all the way into the back seat. "_He wants to meet you_."

Erik, at first gently, then harshly pried Charles's arms off himself and struggled for breath. "Shit, does hugging like that run in the family? Do I need to hold my breath when I walk in the house to meet your dad?"

Charles moved back and sat on Erik's lap. "Erik, this isn't going to be…I mean, you and Raven seem like friends now, but it's not…is it weird? I haven't quite decided for myself if it's weird yet. Have you?"

Erik shook his head as he ran his fingers through Charles's hair. "I've kinda just been focusing on you. Raven and I only dated for a couple of months. Not long enough to be too serious." Erik paused. "Then again you and I have been dating for what, two hours? And we've declared love." Charles's entire body may have turned red at that. Erik chuckled and continued on. "Just because I know you too well, I'll go into detail." Charles smiled ashamedly. Yes, people do know him more than he knows himself. "Loki and I had officially broken up back in late April. I met Raven before that though. Yes?"

Charles's eyes had lit up and Erik could see a highly impatient question there. "Late April you say? Is there anything that happened that would cause you to remember the exact date?"

Erik stared, not understanding. "Um it was the 21st. Like Loki would let me forget. 'You will forever rue the day that' blah blah blah."

Charles's eyes shone. "Thank you for the present then."

Erik sighed. "I would really love if you stopped talking in riddles, Charles."

Charles smirked and wrapped his arms around Erik again, much more lazily this time. "You broke up with Loki on my birthday."

Erik laughed. "You're welcome. I definitely planned it around that date for you. Definitely. Humor me though, I thought you were going to say that was when you broke up with Moira. So when was that?"

Charles 'tch'ed and waved his finger in Erik's face. "I did not 'break up with' Moira. We had a mutual agreement to stop dating. It was rather close to then I suppose. We broke up on April 2nd."

Erik stared at Charles, expecting to laugh off a bad question, but ended up generally shocked. "Well fuck me." Erik leaned forward to kiss Charles gently. "And I meant that as both an expression and an invitation."

Charles bit Erik's lip playfully. "Why should I fuck you? Let's just discuss this as the expression and worry about the invitation later."

Erik pecked Charles on the lips. "April 2nd is _my _birthday…supposedly that is. That's the day I consider my birthday. It's not exactly on record. But it's a close enough coincidence for me."

Charles giggled then realized Erik's expression was not the giddy laughter that Charles felt, but much more sober and passionate rather than young and light hearted. "You don't take coincidence lightly, I presume?"

Erik brought his thumb to Charles's lips and traced them. "You can hardly call something like this a coincidence. It's something one might call…destiny."

Charles tried to continue the dramatic moment, he really did. But this was Charles Xavier, fashionably early was written into his dna. Charles glanced at the clock and Erik sighed. "You're probably the only person in the world who I could say the word destiny to and you don't laugh in my face, but you check the clock. I swear to you, time isn't running out." Erik could've stopped. He knew he could've stopped. He would've stopped there with Loki or Raven, but Charles wouldn't laugh at him. It was so true with Charles… "Time will never run out for us."

Charles's eyes glued onto Erik's. The time was forgotten for the first time in his entire life. His eyes were wide and vulnerable. "Say that again."

Erik brought his lips to Charles's ear. He bit his earlobe and listened to Charles whimper. "Time will never run out for us."

A lot ran through Charles's mind in that moment. Just a few weeks ago, he was checking the web for Broadway auditions and trying to stop himself from wishing he were sleeping with Moira at night. Now here he was, laid bare. An entirely new part of himself brushed off from where it'd been hiding. And not only had Erik allowed this part of him to emerge, Erik had allowed this part of him to shine.

-x-

Charles was giggling again as he walked Erik to the door. The idea of introducing his dad to his boyfriend was unbearable. Charles opened the door and saw where his father was looking. Nothing could stop his laughing faster than that hallway. Erik saw Charles's countenance harden and threaded their fingers together immediately. Charles squeezed Erik's hand and took a deep breath. "Dad?"

Brian Xavier turned around and if Erik were drinking something he would've spit it up. Charles glanced up at the startled Erik. Brian looked equally confused. "Sorry. You guys look exactly alike."

Charles let that sink in a moment and then realization set in and he could not stop laughing if he tried. The hallway was out of his mind easily and all that mattered now was that Erik was currently at war with himself for finding Charles's father attractive.

Brian Xavier's social awkwardness actually proved a blessing in this moment. "So, Erik. I hear you're good at chess?"


	13. Shake It

Erik and Brian began to head toward the study for a game of chess. Charles followed them for a few moments before he passed the clock on the mantle.

"Holy fuck!" Charles startled both himself and his father at the expletive. "Sorry, oh god, sorry. Erik. We were supposed to be at school by now! Show starts in five minutes!"

For some reason, Charles's look of complete and utter panic didn't make him want to rush out of the house. Quite the opposite… He stared at the frazzled bright blue eyes with a fondness he didn't realize was so eagerly triggered in him. Everything about Charles right now was purely endearing. Everything about Charles always was purely endearing. Erik couldn't stop from gently capturing his lips now that he could again. That all this…drama was passed them. No tongue. Just lips, soft and slow. He leaned his forehead against Charles's afterwards before pressing a kiss to his forehead.

Brian Xavier cleared his throat with an embarrassed smile. "You boys have somewhere to be?"

Erik actually blushed. "Sorry, sir. We'll go." Erik went to hold the door for Charles, but Charles's eyes were locked on his father's. Erik silently closed the door behind him and waited in the car.

Brian began to laugh as the door closed. "He called me sir!"

Charles stared at his dad with an amused and fond look with a bit of worry. "So you like him?"

Brian's eyes went wide. "Charles. He wanted to play chess with me. I love 'em. Probably about a millionth of how much you do."

Charles turned bright red and his face blended into his hair. "I- the show. I'll see you tonight."

Charles was walking out the door, but heard his dad mumble "Not if this is anything like you and Moira were."

Somehow Charles turned even more red. He hadn't realized his dad knew about…that. The cool, fall wind blew in his face and Charles snapped out of it and dashed to the car. Erik was almost moving before the door was closed.

-x-

The show went well. It did end up starting late, but no one seemed to care much. Especially not Emma. When things were rushed, there was no time to think about things and though she never had any strong feelings about Charles, the night had left her a bit…dazed. She stood backstage and realized someone had taken the seat with the obstruction. Usually they didn't sell that ticket so they must've been sold ou- No, there were empty chairs. This man specially requested the seat? Emma took her time staring because, well the man was certainly easy to look at. Maybe she would try to catch him after the show. Worth a try.

-x-

The man did ask for that seat. He wanted to watch backstage. Who cared about the ginger that would be bouncing about the stage? He had someone else to look for. And that someone else was not who he was expecting it to be. Blonde hair peeked out from the edge of the curtain and her blue eyes fell right onto his. He'd never admit it, but maybe his jaw dropped a little.

-x-

After the show, Emma practically ripped off her costume and slipped on her white leather skinnies and jacket. She was half way out the door when- oh. A shirt. She shook her head and just zipped up her jacket. Not worth the time it would take. She had to find him. She bolted out from the doors to look through crowd and then back tracked.

She turned around and the two were looking at each other, both a bit shocked and frazzled. Emma just ran out of those doors like a mad woman. That was her first impression. What is this guy thinking about her right now? There goes her chance. Gone.

The man was even more attractive up close and…he was wearing leather too. Black. Her heart…wait, what was that feeling? Unimportant. She had desperate flirting to do.

To her surprise, the man seemed rather forward. "Can I buy you dinner?" He held out a bouquet of white roses.

Instead of answering she asked another question. "Why white roses instead of red?"

The man shrugged and glanced down at her outfit. "They seemed to suit you and I guess I was right to think so."

She smiled. "Emma Frost."

He held up the program. "I know, Wendy."

She stayed quiet for a bit, realizing how easy she was making this. She turned her sass on. "Just so you know I'm only this easy for boys wearing leather."

He laughed. "Me too." Emma stared in shock. The boy started laughing. "In all honesty, I thought I was gay until you peeked your head out from back stage."

Emma's jaw dropped. "_Do I just attract all the gay ones?_"

Loki laughed. "I had a go at Charles too. In fact, it was mostly my fault that you two had that awkward night together. So if you'll forgive me for that, I think we can get along quite nicely. You wear leather and radiate sass like perfume. You were made for me."

Emma slipped her arm through his and they began to walk toward Loki's car. "I think this is the beginning of a beautiful-"

Loki cut her off. "I swear to god if you say friendship, I will fuck you into my backseat before we even leave the parking lot."

Emma stared at him with a quick on her lips. "Friendship."

Loki actually fully laughed and his head tilted back as he did so. "It is absurd how much I like you already."

-x-

Erik stood outside Charles's dressing room after the show. This was just the matinee and there was another show later, but after that Charles's hair would be brunette again. Erik was trying to tell himself he didn't mind but Charles was right. He did kind of like it.

Charles opened the door wearing…oh god what was this idiot wearing. A blue button up and a cardigan. Not just that, but he was actually wearing slacks. Khaki slacks. "Is this some sort of uniform, Charles? Cause I have to say that is actually not one of my kinks."

Charles turned red and looked down at his outfit. "What? What do you mean? What's wrong with this?"

Erik blinked. Oh. So he thought this was just a normal outfit. "Oh, Charles." He wrapped his arm around his waist and ruffled his hair. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with it as long as I can take it off you later."

Charles rolled his eyes. "It's only 2pm."

Erik shrugged. "Five o'clock somewhere?"

Charles stared at him. "That doesn't even…nevermind." Charles's countenance seemed to change. "Did you see what I saw though?" Charles brightened.

Erik shook his head. "I'm assuming I did not and you're dying to tell me."

Charles leaned his head into Erik's chest. No one had walked by them yet and Erik was worrying about just how okay Charles was about coming out. "Emma found someone. She couldn't keep her eyes off of him in the crowd and she literally _ran _off stage after curtain calls."

Erik nodded and tensed as he heard footsteps approaching. He didn't want to say anything, but he the first few days, especially the first day, of coming out were the hardest. He couldn't just let Charles-

"Erik, did you hear me? Emma found someone else! She's not going to be mad at me for that night after all!"

Erik hated that he recognized the sound. He hated that he could tell you who was approaching and how far away they were just by the sound of their shoes. He could also tell by the rhythm that it was a slow approach, and not a snarky one. That didn't change the fact that he had his arms around Charles and Loki was approaching. The idea made his arms wrap tighter around Charles. Did Loki only exist to torture him? Erik didn't even hear the second set of footsteps.

When he finally turned around, Erik saw Emma and Loki hip to hip. Charles was staring at Loki with terror and Erik…

Erik started cracking up.

Loki. And a girl. Not just any girl, Emma Frost. Loki and…and Emma Frost.

Erik imitated the sound of a whip and Loki just glared at him. "Charles, let me introduce you to the first girl Loki will have ever been with and the first person who will ever top him. All the time."

Charles looked up at Erik with caution and was relieved to not see a single trace of lust there. Loki looked…uncomfortable to say the least. As much as he wanted to deny it, no one knew him more than Erik Lehnsherr. "Oh come on. Nothing will ever happen all the time. Much too boring."

Emma seemed offended. "You think I'd be boring? You just said in the car that-"

Loki quickly kissed her. "Emma, dear. As much as I adore torturing these two," he nodded his head to Charles and Erik, "I don't feel the need to throw our sex life at them…just yet."

Emma stared into his eyes coldly. "Make it up to me."

"There's only one way I know to do that." Loki and Emma quickly left.

Charles and Erik stared after them, not knowing whether to puke or applaud at the match. Then Loki turned and yelled back at them, "Oh! The reason I passed by was to say sorry and that I have good proof to promise I won't bother you anymore!"

The door closed behind Loki and Emma and Charles managed a small laugh. Erik just stared at the door. "…Erik? You alright?"

His head minutely shook. "Won't bother me anymore…"

That was good, wasn't it? Erik tried to sort through what he wanted and what Loki had literally etched into his mind. Yes. It was good. Erik could have Charles. Loki wouldn't bother them. This was good, really extremely amazingly good.

Erik brought their lips together. It was far from chaste, but Erik wasn't thinking about being in public anymore. His hands fell into the back pocket of, "Fuck, Charles. I can't believe you're wearing slacks."

Charles shrugged and pulled himself impossibly closer to Erik, hands on the very small, small of his waist. "And I can't believe you're this skinny. We must learn to accept things, darling."

Erik sputtered out a laugh. "Darling?"

Charles's pupils were slits. Anyone's would be with how Erik's voice just sounded saying the word 'darling' while his thumbs rubbed circles into Charles's hip bones.

Charles's hands were on either side of Erik's hand, kissing him firmly.

"EHEM."

Charles froze. "Oh god, um. I'm sorry. Um, I, Moira, is today awkward visit from your ex day?"

Moira started laughing. "Yeah, I overheard that Loki Emma thing. People seem to easily forget that tech people actually do climb up to the catwalk."

Charles blushed and forced himself to step away from Erik, but Erik just kept his arm around Charles's waist and pulled him back. "Thanks for stopping by, Moira. We'll see you at tonight's show." Erik's voice was a low and steady…no it wasn't a growl, it was soft. But still sounded protective and…sexy.

Charles didn't even say goodbye to Moira as he tugged Erik's arm with him as he ran into the dressing room.


	14. I Can See Clearly Now

It was over. After all the time of love and secret admiration that had been somehow discovered and mutually felt, it was over. It ended in a way that they really had expected. Everyone had seen it coming. It was pretty much planned out. What else could Charles say? He looked in the mirror, wiping his face with a towel. He scrubbed at his face some more but it wasn't going to change things. It was over.

Charles's hair was brown.

Erik walked up behind him and stared at Charles in the mirror. "You really could've left it. No one would've minded as long as you were happy, Charles."

A pout slowly made its way onto Charles's lips. "But Emma said she was going to _drown_ me. And now Loki would totally help her."

Again that unnervingly sexy growl sent shivers down Charles's spine. "Loki will never be able to touch you. I'll get you a restraining order."

Charles sighed. "Oh come on, I really think he meant it. He's going to leave us alone."

Erik remained silent as Charles's optimism flew over the years of memories Erik had and just how earnest Loki was capable of being. It didn't seem like a good chance, but Emma would most likely have him whipped by now and Loki would be as happy as…well as happy as Loki could be. He always liked whips.

Erik squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose. Not that that information was relevant to Erik. Not anymore at least.

When Erik's eyes looked on Charles's in the mirror, he met a very wary gaze, but that slipped away as Charles already knew what Erik was thinking about and didn't care to have his guess confirmed. "You're going to miss it, aren't you?"

Erik let out a short breath and returned his thoughts to Charles's hair. "I truly think everyone will miss it. Whether they admit it or not."

Erik sat on the couch while Charles continued scrubbing the extra dye off his face. Erik resumed his carefully practiced hobby of staring at Charles's closed notebook with more lust than he'd ever felt toward an inanimate object, and he's had a lot of experience with inanimate objects.

"So how exactly do you know how to dye hair? Or does that just come with being gay?" Charles looked at Erik with a mischievous smile and waited for the scoff…or no, the snort.

Erik snorted. Charles's giggle interrupted him. Erik paused but then ignored it and answered the question. "Let's just say Loki's hair isn't naturally that black."

Charles turned around with a fierce energy about him. "Oh my god I knew it. There was no way he could have that pale of a complexion with his hair naturally that dark. It's just wrong."

Erik tried to suppress his laughter, he really did. "How exactly did you ever think you weren't gay?"

Charles's serious expression scattered for a second as he giggled. "It's not gay, it's science. Genetics to be exact. The subject I would give my heart to if acting hadn't gotten me pregnant."

Erik blinked. "Your analogies go a bit too far sometimes."

Charles shook his head and returned to the mirror. "No, I'm quite sure that one was perfect."

((I'M SO SORRY. This update took longer than forever. It took 5ever and I apologize a lot. I know this is a short update but I wanted you to have SOMETHING. No this isn't over yet. They've not even graduated yet! I mean come on! So yes, expect more. Also, I'm not sure if I've mentioned it before but my tumblr is at aprofessorstale and if you want an update SPAM MY ASK BOX. I'm not even kidding. Do it. Sometimes I need to be reminded you're waiting on me. So once again I'm sorry and THANK YOU SO MUCH IF YOU ACTUALLY WERE WAITING ON THIS. THAT MEANS SO MUCH ON IT'S OWN. THANK YOU AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK OF THE STORY SO FAR. I mean the whole point of fanfiction is, while I can have fun too, is to give fans what they want. So yeah, let me know and once again THANK YOU. I'M SORRY. THANK YOU.))


	15. Renegade

Steve was at the table, head in his hands. His cereal sat uneaten in front of him. Tony glanced over with a look of concern he only showed when no one was looking. He walked over and let his hand fall on Steve's shoulder while he put down a piece of toast. They had to go to work and Steve had to eat _something._

"Steve, we're gonna make it through this. Erik doesn't even have to know." Tony could feel the lies slipping through his teeth, but there'd been enough honest words spoken late last night and Tony's back was still hurting from sleeping on the couch. Not that the couch was uncomfortable, Tony just needed to be complain about it. There were other rooms he could've stayed in, but his traditionalist husband made sure he was on the couch. He sicked Jarvis on him.

Steve had been rather restless through the night and any amount of calm and collected he had evaporated. "Doesn't have to know?" Steve didn't move from where he was. "He needs to go to the meeting. If he doesn't, we all go to court. I'm pretty sure we go to court regardless of what happens. We have to tell him sooner or later. And I'm not a big fan of later."

Tony tried to think of something sassy to say, but Steve already knew, Tony was scared. Not much can scare Tony Stark, but this had him frozen. "It's not like I don't have the mone-"

"He has money too, Tony. He's just gonna keep coming back."

"Then I'll keep paying the fee!"

When Steve turned around, Tony knew his word was final. Steve's eyes were red with unshed tears, but he didn't look weak. Steve looked stronger than Tony had ever seen him and maybe they were both scared, but that look gave him hope. "We're fighting this fight. We're not running away. We get this over with. Erik's almost 18 anyway. Then he decides."

Tony responded with a single nod and left to get the keys.

-x-

Erik was slouched all the way down in his desk with his head on the desk behind him. His eyes were open though and he stayed motionless. "-rik?" He blinked and sat up slowly.

"Sorry, what'd you say?"

Mr. Howlett's eyes expressed his own weird and stoic way of being sympathetic, but Erik didn't know what he was sympathizing with. Nothing was wrong, Erik just knew something was up with Steve and Tony but it was probably about a birthday present. Steve could never keep his mouth shut. Mr. Howlett just sighed. "Bad timing, kid."

Someone in the door way cleared their throat. Erik didn't need to turn around. He groaned and grabbed his backpack. Principal Fury had caught him sleeping enough times that Erik knew the drill. Not that he was sleeping this time, but something took the fight out of him today and he went along quietly.

-x-

Charles was in his office aid period and he walked happily to Steve's room. Everything was going how he'd always hoped, but three time better. He and Erik were happy, out, and still had friends. Loki and Emma were both out of his hair. Moira was going to audition for the next play. Everything was spectacular, spectacular.

So when Charles opened the door and the two opposing auras crashed, Charles took most of the damage. "Mr. Rogers…"

Steve turned toward his computer. "Now's not a good time, Charles." Charles put the envelope on his desk quietly. "Oh…right. Office aid. Sorry, I didn't mean to assume- That was rude."

Charles shook his head more times than necessary. "No, you were right to assume. I come in here a lot to talk so… Um, have a good day Mr. Rogers."

Charles bolted. He knew everyone had bad days, even teachers. But Steve hadn't even tried to stop Charles from calling him Mr. Rogers and nothing about that boded well.

Charles went to his next stop at Mr. Banner's room. He loved Mr. Banner. The science was just…more than Charles could ask for. Turns out he and Erik were both in the class but different periods, go figure. When Charles walked in he could feel a bit of pity. Before Charles could say anything, Mr. Banner spoke up.

"Charles, excuse me for asking a personal question, but you and Erik are together, aren't you?" He looked embarrassed, but didn't really blush. "We teachers can't control all the gossip we hear."

Charles shook his head as we spoke. "No, it's fine I don't mind. Yes, we are."

Mr. Banner's eyebrows came together a little and pity seeped into his gaze. "I see…well you be strong for him. Erik's going to need someone to help him through these next few weeks."

Charles racked his mind for anything Erik could have mentioned, but nothing stood out. "Mr. Banner, I don't mean to be rude, but I'm not sure exactly what you're talking about."

As Mr. Banner spoke, the papers fell from Charles's hand. No. Not now.

-x-

When Erik made it to Mr. Fury's office, he sat at a desk and got out homework for ISS, but Mr. Fury just rolled his eyes…eye…his eye…and waved his hand at it. "Not today, Lehnsherr. That's not what I stopped by the class for. I know you're going to be missing a few days of class coming up, so I wanted to make sure you were getting on top of getting that work done. I really do want you to graduate and get out of here at last, so I'm actually willing to help."

Erik just sat and stared. Everyone knew something he didn't.

Fury waited, but when Erik was silent he rephrased. "You're gonna be missing, aren't you? Tony told me about the court case. Being sued and all. Weird that Tony doesn't just pay it off like the other ones, but I assume Steve had a say in that."

The clock on the wall ticked more loudly than was possible.

"You do know what I'm talking about, don't you?"

Charles burst into the room, eyes red and face wiped of tears he didn't want Erik to see. Erik stood as Charles fell into his arms. Charles's face buried into Erik's shoulders and Erik whispered into Charles's hair. "Can _you_ tell me what's going on? Cause I seem to be the only one who doesn't know."

Charles took a deep breath and looked Erik in the eye. "It's your dad, Erik."

Erik braced for bad news, but wasn't sure what Charles was getting at. "Which one?"

Charles shook his head slowly, carefully. "Your real dad. He's suing for custody."

((DISCLAIMER: Nothing about this story arc will have any amount of legal accuracy. I'm pretty sure a court case like this isn't even possible. I just like it as far as the story goes and this is fanfiction so I'll do what I want thank you. I'm not a law student. I don't know what I'm talking about and I'm not going to pretend to. Also, I've just started college so it's horrible of me to post this as I probably will again not upload for a while, but maybe I will. For your sake, I hope I do.))


	16. THIS FIC IS MOVING

Hey guys! Sorry, this ISN'T a new chapter but I figured I'd let you know I moved this fic to AO3. I just like the format better. If this link doesn't work, my username there is aprofessorstale. If you're still waiting for updates for some CRAZY reason, thanks for your...patience and your strange loyalty. NEVER DOUBT THAT I DO INDEED LOVE YOU.

/works/594054/chapters/1069974


End file.
